I marry early, just 20 years old. My husband na 24 that time. We love ourself well-well. E no even reach one month for our marriage, I don carry belle. We happy as young couple wey dey expect their first pikin. We prepare everything down for the baby. But na for delivery room my joy begin turn to pain. I labour for almost 3 days. When I finally born, na baby boy, but the baby come weak. Two hours later, my pikin d!e. I cry tire. My husband too cry. But we encourage ourself say, "We go try again." Six months later, I carry belle again. After 9 months — another stillbirth. Third belle, the same thing happen. Na so my family say, “This marriage no be for you. Come out, go complete your university.” But I refuse. I love my husband. I believe say better go still happen. Some people say na spiritual matter. We begin waka from church to prophet, prayer upon prayer. Prophet assure us say “This time, e go work.” I carry belle again, the fourth one. I born the baby, the baby even cry small, but by evening the baby d!e. Doctor call am “sudden infant death.” No explanation. Just fear. Na that period doctor advise say make we give gap before we try again. I tell my husband make we try adopt for now. Him agree. I call my cousin wey say she dey work for one motherless home. We give her over 1.6 million. Na so she dupe us carry money vanish. My husband vex. Say him no even believe for adoption before, na just to please me. Him say make I no ask am money again. I begin follow the matter spiritually again. Different prophecies, no solution. One day, my friend tell me about one doctor for East wey young girls dey born give away babies for money. Baby Boy na 1.5 million, girl na 1 million. She say e legit. I tell my husband, he say, "I no dey interestedand i no get any money to bring out." I go borrow money. I give my friend 600k as first payment. One week later, na online I see video of my friend—dem dey beat her say she thief her neighbor pikin wan carry come give me. I shock. My heart cut. I run go show my husband. He say, "Better no involve me for this matter" Next day, police land arrest me. My husband say, “Follow them go. I go get lawyer.” I call my family, dem say, “As you no hear word when we try rescue you, make Love bail you out now.” Just like play, I land prison. No lawyer. No family. My husband visit me only 3 times. After that, silence. My friend wey thief the baby, her people raise money bail her. She promise to help me too. Nothing happen. I stay 5 years for prison for matter I no understand finish. Just because say I want born, just because say I no get patience, just because say I trust wrong people. Different NGO dey come prison. Dem go give us food, tissue, pad — and hope. Many promise to help me after I share my story. But nothing come out. Until one day, one woman wey be women advocate listen to me. She promise to help. I no believe, but she really help me comot from jail. When I reach house, my husband don move. Don remarry with three children already. When I go see am, him say make I find peace. Say our fate no match. That day, I wan just disappear. I tell the woman wey help me. She say, “Come stay with me.” She encourage me. Enrol me back for catering school make I refresh my baking skills. From there I start my small baking business. But inside me, I still dey cry. I no even fit look mirror. I don lose shape, lose beauty, lose hope. One day, I go deliver wedding cake. As i reach the venue the people bounce me — say I no fit enter because I look “dirty.” That day, I cry reach house. I tell myself, “I go change this story.” I download Pinterest app, dey learn how to dress my body type. I watch make-up beginners videos. I start to buy small affordable good clothes. I begin dey apply simple makeup. I switch to skin care wey dey moisturize my skin. I begin see my beauty again. Customers begin notice. Begin compliment me. I start dey take pictures. I start dey smile. My self-confidence begin return. One day, I go deliver cake again. I dress well. The bride say I fine. Na there one man collect my number, say na for business. But na love him come find. Him fine, young, tall — and kind. I open up tell am everything. He say, “Your past no be your name. Let’s build something new.” Today, I don marry again. I don born two boys through CS operation. Dem survive. My first son na 4 years, second one 2 years. My husband say no need to born again — these ones complete us. And truly, I no need anything else again. I don finally become mama. Today I dey grateful say After all my tough challenges God still change my story. --- To every woman wey don carry belle with joy but return house empty-handed — this message na for you. The pain of stillbirth no be small thing. Na one deep wound wey only God fit understand. Sometimes you go dey ask, “Why me?” Sometimes the silence go loud, the tears go come uninvited. But make you hear this one: you never fail. Your womb no betray you. Your heart still be the heart of a mother. And even if the world no see your kind of pain, God see am, and He go still comfort you in ways wey go shock you. To the women wey don lose their self-esteem because dem no get money take take care of their body, or childbirth don change the way dem look — My sister, remember say your beauty no end for body. Start small, love yourself again, dress well, start with your budget, manage your weight if necessary. Self love dey build back self esteem You go rise again and glow in your own time. To the women wey their husband don abandon them — No carry your life hang for one person wey walk away. God never walk away from you. Stand up, dust your pain, start again. Look good, take care of yourself. You still fit laugh again, love again, and shine again. To Every Woman and Family wey dey fight silent battles — May God surprise you with joy wey go wipe all your secret tears. Amen. #everyoneシ゚ #woman #virals #marriage

A LONG READ How do we choose the people we fall in love with? The Romantic answer is that our instincts naturally guide us to individuals who are kind and good for us. Love is a sort of ecstasy that descends when we feel ourselves in the presence of a benign and nourishing soul, who will answer our emotional needs, understand our sadness and strengthen us for the hard tasks of our lives. In order to locate our lover, we must let our instincts carry us along, taking care never to impede them through pedantic psychological analysis and introspection or else considerations of status, wealth or lineage. Our feelings will tell us clearly enough when we have reached our destiny. To ask someone with any degree of rigour why exactly they have chosen a particular partner is – in the Romantic world-view – simply an unnecessary and offensive misunderstanding of love: true love is an instinct that accurately and naturally settles on those with a capacity to make us happy. The Romantic attitude sounds warm and kind. Its originators certainly imagined that it would bring an end to the sort of unhappy relationships previously brokered by parents and society. The only difficulty is that our obedience to instinct has, very often, proved to be a disaster of its own. Respecting the special feelings we get around certain people in nightclubs and train stations, parties and websites and that Romanticism so ably celebrated in art appears not to have led us to be any happier in our unions than a Medieval couple shackled into marriage by two royal courts keen to preserve the sovereignty of a slice of ancestral land. ‘Instinct’ has been little better than ‘calculation’ in underwriting the quality of our love stories. Romanticism would not at this point, however, give up the argument quite so easily. It would simply ascribe the difficulties we often have in love to not having looked hard enough for that central fixture of Romantic reverie: the right person. This being is inevitably still out there (every soul must have its soulmate, Romanticism assures us), it is just that we haven’t managed to track them down – yet. So we must continue the search, with all the technology and tenacity necessary, and maybe, once the divorce has come through and the house has been sold, we’ll get it right. But there’s another school of thought, this one influenced by psychoanalysis, which challenges the notion that instinct invariably draws us to those who will make us happy. The theory insists that we don’t fall in love first and foremost with those who care for us in ideal ways, we fall in love with those who care for us in familiar ways. Adult love emerges from a template of how we should be loved that was created in childhood and is likely to be entwined with a range of problematic compulsions that militate in key ways against our chances of growth. We may believe we are seeking happiness in love, but what we are really after is familiarity. We are looking to re-create, within our adult relationships, the very feelings we knew so well in childhood – and which were rarely limited to just tenderness and care. The love most of us will have tasted early on was confused with other, more destructive dynamics: feelings of wanting to help an adult who was out of control, of being deprived of a parent’s warmth or scared of his or her anger, or of not feeling secure enough to communicate our trickier wishes. How logical, then, that we should as adults find ourselves rejecting certain candidates not because they are wrong but because they are a little too right – in the sense of seeming somehow excessively balanced, mature, understanding and reliable – given that in our hearts, such rightness feels foreign and unearned. We chase after more exciting others, not in the belief that life with them will be more harmonious, but out of an unconscious sense that it will be reassuringly familiar in its patterns of frustration. Psychoanalysis calls the process whereby we identify our partners ‘object choice’ – and recommends that we try to understand the factors semi-consciously governing our attractions in order to interrupt the unhealthier patterns that might be at play. Our instincts – our strong undercurrents of attraction and revulsion – stem from complicated experiences we had when we were far too young to understand them, and which linger in the antechambers of our minds. Psychoanalysis doesn’t wish to suggest that everything about our attractions will be deformed. We may have quite legitimate aspirations to positive qualities: intelligence, charm, generosity… But we are also liable to be fatefully drawn towards trickier tendencies: someone who is often absent, or treats us with a little disdain, or needs to be surrounded all the time by friends, or cannot master their finances. However paradoxical it can sound, without these tricky behaviours, we may simply not be able to feel passionate or tender with someone. Alternatively, we may have been so traumatised by a parental figure, we cannot approach any partner who shares qualities with them of any kind, even ones disconnected from their negative sides. We might in love be rigidly intolerant of anyone who is intelligent, or punctual or interested in science, simply because these were the traits of someone who caused us a great deal of difficulty early on. To choose our partners wisely, we need to tease out how our compulsions to suffering or our rigid flights from trauma may be playing themselves out in our feelings of attraction. A useful starting place is to ask ourselves (perhaps in the company of a large sheet of paper, a pen and a free afternoon) what sort of people really put us off. Revulsion and disgust are useful first guides because we are likely to recognize that some of the traits that make us shiver are not objectively negative and yet feel to us distinctly off-putting. We might, for example, sense that someone who asks us too much about ourselves, or is very tender or dependable, will seem extremely eerie and frightening. And we might equally well, along the way, recognize that a degree of cruelty or distance belong to an odd list of the things we appear genuinely to need in order to love. It can be tricky to avoid self-censorship here, but the point isn’t to represent ourselves as reassuring, predictable people, but to get to know the curious quirks of our own psyches. We’ll tend to find that some ostensibly pretty nice things are getting caught in our love filters: people who are eloquent, clever, reliable, sunny can set off loud alarms. This is vital knowledge. We should pause and try to fathom where the aversions come from, what aspects of our past have made it so hard for us to accept certain sorts of emotional nourishment. Each time we recognize a negative, we’re discovering a crucial association in our own minds: we’re alighting on an impossibility of love based on associations from the past projected onto the present. An additional way we can get at the associations which circulate powerfully in the less noticed corners of our brains is to finish stub-sentences, that invite us to respond to things that might charm or repel us about someone. We get to see our own reactions more clearly when we write things down without thinking too much about our answers, catching the mind’s unconscious at work. For instance, we can deliberately jot the first things that come into our heads when we read the following: • If I tell a partner how much I need them, they will… • When someone tells me they really need me, I… • If someone can’t cope, I… • When someone tells me to get my act together, I … • If I were to be frank about my anxieties … • If my partner told me not to worry, I’d… • When someone blames me unfairly, I … Our honestly described reactions are legacies. They are revealing underlying assumptions we have acquired about what love can look like. We may start to get a clearer picture that our vision of what we are looking for in another person might not be an especially good guide to our personal or mutual happiness. Examining our emotional histories, we see that we can’t be attracted to just anyone. Getting to know the past, we come to recognise our earlier associations for what they are: generalisations we formed – entirely understandably – on the basis of just one or, hugely impressive, examples. We’ve unknowingly turned some local associations into strict rules for relationships. Even if we can’t radically shift the pattern, it’s useful to know that we are carrying a ball and chain. It can make us more careful of ourselves when we feel overwhelmed by a certainty that we’ve met the one, after a few minutes chatting at the bar. Ultimately, we stand to be liberated to love different people to our initial ‘types’, because we find that the qualities we like, and the ones we very much fear, are found in different constellations from those we encountered in the people who first taught us about affection, long ago in a childhood we are starting at last to understand and free ourselves from. ©️The Counsellor

A word fitly spoken is like apples of gold in pictures of silver.As an earring of gold, and an ornament of fine gold, so is a wise reprover upon an obedient ear.

I can upload pictures or video

Good evening, why l can not post pictures since yesterday up till now?

A word fitly spoken is like apples of gold in pictures of silver. As an earring of gold, and an ornament of fine gold, so is a wise reprover upon an obedient ear.

Date with a purpose. You deserve someone who has plans on marrying you one day. You deserve to find someone who understands love is not a game. It’s actually an investment. You know, as a person dating someone you should look at your partner as the mother or father of your future children. If you can’t picture them in the aisle, walking towards you with tears in your eyes, do me a favor ..... leave them alone. If you can’t picture the two of you building your dream home together or leaving homemade cookies out for Santa the night before Christmas with your children, there again .... leave them alone. Take my advice and if you don't plan on marrying them and building a future with them, take your hands off another person's future. ~ Cody Bret

“RAISING A CHILD WITHOUT RULES IS RAISING A DISASTER” (Why freedom without boundaries is destroying today’s kids) Let’s stop lying to ourselves: Children don’t need too much freedom — they need firm direction. You think you're giving them "space to express themselves"? But what you're really doing is giving them a fast-lane ticket… To self-destruction. A child without boundaries will test everything. They’ll test time. They’ll test truth. They’ll test how far they can go — until something breaks. And when there are no rules, no “NOs,” no clear lines drawn… They don’t become confident. They become confused. You’re not helping their self-esteem. You’re raising someone who won’t respect law, leadership, or life. Parents, wake up: It’s not “modern parenting” to allow your 12-year-old do what they like. It’s not “freedom” to let your 15-year-old lock their door 24/7 and live like a tenant. It’s not “trust” to hand them a phone, laptop, and data without supervision. That’s not love. That’s neglect with WiFi. Look around you: Kids cursing their parents online. Teenagers dressing like strippers and calling it “fashion.” Boys addicted to porn and calling it “freedom of expression.” Girls posting half-naked pictures with captions like “God’s masterpiece.” Young boys who can’t say “yes sir” or “no ma” because they were “raised to speak their minds.” What’s the result? A generation that wants respect but knows nothing about discipline. Let’s be clear: Boundaries don’t destroy children — they build them. Rules don’t limit children — they shape them. Discipline is not wickedness — it’s protection. Correction is not abuse — it’s love in motion. A child who grows up without consequences becomes an adult who disrespects everything — including God, law, and you. Many of you are afraid to say “NO” because you want to be liked. But parenting is not about popularity. Your job is not to be their best friend. Your job is to raise a man, to mold a woman, to train a future leader. And yes, it will involve: Saying no. Checking phones. Cutting off bad friends. Seizing devices. Setting curfews. And making tough decisions that your child will not like — but will thank you for later. Don’t wait till damage is done: Don’t wait until the police call you. Don’t wait until you’re dragged to a hospital. Don’t wait until you’re kneeling in church, crying, “Where did I go wrong?” The time to guide is now. The time to lead is now. Final Word: Give your child structure, not just softness. Give them discipline, not just data. Give them correction, not just comfort. Because no matter how sweet your child is, freedom without rules will turn even an angel into a problem. Happy parenting to us all. Copied!!!!!!!

Dear Men... When the time comes for you to choose a wife, don’t just look for beauty, curves, charm, or even just intelligence. Marry a woman who knows how to go to war in the spirit. Because in these last days, anti-marriage demons have gone on a wild rampage. Homes are under siege. Marriages are crumbling. Families are falling apart—not just from misunderstandings, but from unseen spiritual battles many are too blind or too passive to fight. You need more than a good cook or a beautiful face. You need a woman who can stand in prayer—not only beside you but ahead of you when needed. A woman who understands spiritual warfare, who doesn’t run to people to solve marital issues, but runs to her knees before God. Let me tell you something many won’t say out loud: > There is no such thing as “happily ever after” if your wife has no spiritual depth. If she doesn't have the Bible, go to church Don't participate in church activities iii Marriage may look like a physical union—flesh and blood—but it is ultimately governed in the spiritual realm. It’s either the Holy Spirit is guiding and sustaining it, or an evil spirit is tearing it down, depending on who you and your wife yield to. If she’s not sensitive to spiritual atmospheres... If she doesn’t discern attacks before they happen... If she doesn’t know how to speak the Word over your home, cover your children, or pray through the night when the enemy comes knocking... Then, no matter how sweet she is on the outside, she becomes a spiritual liability—easily manipulated by demonic forces to cause division, resentment, bitterness, or worse. So my son, marry a woman who will be your battle partner in prayer, Not just your partner in pictures. Marry a woman who can lift her voice to Heaven, Not just lift her lashes for selfies. Marry a woman who will fast with you when things are tough, Not one who runs when the storm comes. Marry a woman who fears God more than she fears losing followers on social media. Because when the real battles of life come—and they will— You’ll thank God you married a woman who knows how to fight. Love is beautiful. Marriage is sacred. But without spiritual backing, it becomes fragile. So don’t just ask, > “Is she lovely?” Ask, > “Can she pray?” Because your destiny, your peace, your children, and your calling depend on it.

When you see the first picture your mind is fan bu

There nothing pregnant no go do just look pictures before pregnant and pregnant 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

Older women are becoming more beautiful every day! Women 30 and up, bless us with your Sunday best pictures! 🥰📸❤️