I have been with my husband for over 13 years. His ex-wife turned his children against me, then, so sadly, 1 year ago she passed away. I am trying to build a relationship with them however, my husband thinks they think they’re going against their mom if they are close to me, even though I just want to be their friend, not their mom. Also, his Italian family has still not accepted me. It’s so difficult because with my previous marriage, I was so close with his entire family, closer to when he was. Now, now I have to wait until they accept me and I don’t know if it will ever happen. I just don’t know what to do anymore. When I first met him, I was hoping I would have children for the first time, not real children, and not to call me mom but children, they would never allow that because of their mom. They put her on a huge pedestal. Lastly, when I try to address it with my husband, he gets angry with me. Any suggestions would be helpful!

I've been in an emotionally difficult relationship for over 15 years, 5 kids. My husband is highly critical, screams at me, screams at the kids, spanks them constantly over minutia, anything I question I'm an argumentative c***, feminism has seeped its poison into me, ect. I kept trying and reaching out, if I just did better, if he would just trust me, its pain and fear talking, all the things.

Well, I finally left last week. I've left before for a couple weeks, but I always end up back because I know God hates a broken marriage, your to sacrifice for your spouse and so on. So I leave, take a breather, he gets nicer, I keep trying, classic cycle.

Well, after almost 2 decades, I said screw it, I'm out, my kids are messed up, they flinch when you try to hug them and are non stop angry, Their dad just keeps trying to beat it out of them, I got to go.

So I walked. I stopped responding to him, anything. When I told the kids we weren't living with Daddy anymore, they cheered.

Well, now God's Got ahold of him. He's seen the light. He sees now that I was never the one abusing him and he's destroyed his family. He stole our joy, he never loved me, ext, and now apparently he's going to. He gave an in depth heartfelt apology to all the kids, to me, and promised to be different. Disney Dad. Its been a week, so far he's been exemplary.

I am not running back into that. I believe he's sincere, but I'm not sure he's going to stick and I'm ready to bounce. My mom is very mad at me because I am thinking that a 4 months is around when I'll go back, IF it sticks. She says thats not enough and my kids need to heal and I should take 2 years, if he really loves us, he will wait.

Am I crazy to think 2 years is unreasonable? If it were me and I'd really made a true change or shift, 2 years seems a long time. Whats a reasonable time line?

Edit- I'm not asking is he can change, I know its unlikely. I'm saying if he is a unicorn who DOES change, how long does it make sense to stay away? The kids are super excited they have a "new dad."

*Jimmy Swaggart Dies at 90. But the World Only Remembered the Prostitute.*

That was the SABC News headline. A man who preached to millions. A man whose music touched nations. A man whose ministry shaped generations. But the world summarized his legacy in one line:

“Tele-evangelist caught with a prostitute.”

Is it fair? No.
Is it worldly? Yes.
But is it a warning to all of us? Absolutely.

The world is not forgiving. The world does not forget. We may have peace with God, but that doesn’t mean we’ll have peace with men. We may be cleared in the court of heaven, but public memory doesn’t cleanse easily.

This is not about Jimmy Swaggart. This is about you, about me, about all of us. Ministers. Leaders. Fathers. Carriers of weight in the Kingdom.

The lesson?
Don’t mess up. Don’t play with sin. Don’t take grace as license.
People have a strange illusion that mere time cancels sin. It doesn’t. Time may blur details, but scandal sticks, especially involving a man of God.

Here’s a call to arms for ministers of the gospel

1. Engage in real, ruthless accountability—not cosmetic check-ins, but real brotherhood.

2. Guard your moral life like a man guards a nuclear code. If you fall sexually, your voice may still
echo but your credibility will collapse.

3. Handle finances with fear and trembling. Don’t manipulate the gospel for profit.

4. Build real systems around your life. Not fans. Not dependents. Not enablers. Build integrity into your daily decisions.

The measure of our anointing is not our gifting it’s our ability to remain holy when no one is watching.

Satan is patient. He doesn’t care if you preach 10,000 sermons as long as he can get you to collapse in one moment of compromise. And when it happens, your entire legacy is redefined in seconds.

If the story of Jimmy Swaggart teaches us anything it’s this: Pray to the One who is able to keep you from falling. And then, walk like you know the whole world is watching. Because they are.

God forgives. Men remember. Don’t be reckless with grace. Don’t gamble with your legacy.

Let this be a call. A warning. A fire alarm in the spirit. God still uses broken men but the consequences of public failure don’t vanish with anointed tears.

Stay clean. Stay low. Stay accountable. Stay burning.

Question, I exude masculine energy because my husband put me there. He has pleaded a few times now that he wants me to be “submissive” hate that word with a passion now. He has asked me to allow him to lead. Our marriage, our family you name it. This is very hard for me. I have had to pick us up many times that this is now my norm. Honestly, I DONT want it! Im exhausted. I have taken the step back and have opened the door wide open to have him take the lead. He has noticed and now has a problem with things… in some things he claims everything that comes out of my mouth is “disrespectful” all im doing is speaking my half and he cant stand it. No more “safe space” to share what im thinking? We actually used to communicate well, he understood me before I even tried… wants the title but not do the work? I’m at a loss. What advice for the love of Pete…. It’s like the whole cake and eat it to thing? We are like magnets and not facing the right way. He feeds off my energy of me opening the door for him to lead, takes it negatively and reacts reactively. Im left with my shoulders up going LEAD! Wide open… this is already difficult for me to even open the door I’m trying… so when I get there and being met with disappointment? Is that the right word I feel like it’s more damaging than what was even going on in the first place….

I’d really like to hear your honest opinion.
Would you ever marry a man who has two children from two different women?
● With the first woman, he had a daughter out of wedlock and never even acknowledged her.
● He is currently married to the second woman, but he doesn’t support her, even though she is pregnant.
● He avoids paying child support to both women.

He says he was traumatized by the first woman because, according to him, she “tricked” him by claiming she was on the pill when she wasn’t.

What would you do in such a situation?

Thank you in advance for your advice!

Don’t Let people around you Stop You From Raising Your Boys Into Men

You’re not just raising boys.

You’re raising future protectors.

Future builders.

Future kings.

And if you let softness win in your home—if you let comfort replace character—you won’t just lose your sons…

You’ll unleash broken men into a world that already has too many of them.

Let’s be clear:

The world doesn’t care about a man’s feelings.

It only respects his function.

So if your wife thinks your discipline is “too harsh,” “too traditional,” or “too outdated”—remind her:

You’re not raising a pet. You’re preparing a warrior.

Let’s break it down:

—

1. You’re Not a Disciplinarian—You’re a Blacksmith

Your job isn’t to scold.

It’s to forge.

A boy’s ego must be shaped.

His emotions must be tempered.

His desires must be trained.

Because if you don’t train your son?

The streets will.

The courts will.

The morgue will.

And all that “gentle parenting” won’t mean a thing when he can’t hold a job, respect a woman, or lead his own family.

So stop letting softness sabotage strength.

And stop letting your wife treat your correction like cruelty.

—

2. Disagree in Private—Stand United in Front of the Kids

If she undercuts you in front of your son?

You lose him.

It’s that simple.

Because when Mom says “he’s too hard on you” or rolls her eyes when you speak?

She’s not protecting the boy.

She’s dividing the home.

A divided voice equals no voice.

And when your child sees you lose authority?

He stops listening.

Not just to you—but to all discipline.

So talk it out later.

But in front of the children?

You are the father. Period.

—

3. Provision Is More Than Money—It’s Authority

You want to lead?

Provide.

You want to enforce discipline?

Provide.

You want your sons to listen when you speak?

Provide.

Because the man who carries the weight has the right to set the rules.

You don’t need to buy Ferraris.

But you need to be the reason the lights stay on and the fridge isn’t empty.

Your wife can supplement.

But never surrender provision.

Because a man who doesn’t provide?

Gets parented by his own children.

—

4. Don’t Raise Another Man’s Child and Ignore Your Own

You’re not the savior.

You’re not Jesus in sandals.

You don’t need to “fix” the broken family she walked away from.

You need to build your own.

Every second you spend raising someone else’s child while yours goes without?

You’re training a son who will one day ask:

“Where were you when I needed you?”

And he won’t care about your noble intentions.

He’ll only remember your absence.

So unless he shares your DNA or your last name?

Let that child’s father do his job.

And do yours with your own.

—

5. Fight for Custody Like Their Lives Depend on It—Because They Do

Don’t let courts rob you.

Don’t let systems silence you.

Don’t let her take them away because “you’re not emotionally available.”

You are their father.

And the presence of a strong father reduces crime, depression, suicide, and dropout rates.

When Dad stays?

Kids thrive.

Especially boys.

So if they take them from you?

Fight.

With everything.

Your name.

Your legacy.

Your money.

Because your sons don’t just need a parent—they need a model.

And you are that model.

—

Final Word: You’re Not Raising Sons—You’re Building a Civilization

Don’t apologize for being firm.

Don’t shrink because she cries.

Don’t surrender because she calls it “toxic.”

The world is falling apart because men stopped fathering.

And wives started interfering.

Be gentle, yes.

But never passive.

Because one day your son will face storms you can’t stop.

And the only thing that will protect him…

Is the strength you had the courage to build into him.

So raise your voice.

Raise your standard.

Raise your boys into men.

Hey all! My husband and I have been married for 9 years but together for 17. We’ve had many ups and downs and almost didn’t make it a few times prior to getting married. To make a VERY long story short..over the years of being together I’ve started resenting him for the way he treats me. It’s not abusive or anything..he’s just a business man and has that mentality in life. He also claims he wants his wife to be his best friend but really doesn’t treat me that way. He hardly ever responds to text, is judgmental, compares us/me to other couples/wives, etc… The past 2 or so years our relationship has really gone downhill..more recently he has made comments about the possibility of separating for a bit. He also says things like, I’m in my 40s, if this is not what you want anymore just let me go..he said this again last night and was genuine, not harsh, not argumentative..just truthful. I almost felt like he wanted me to say ok, then I’m done. This has happened multiple times. He acts like it’s not what he wants but it basically seeing if it’s what I want..or at least it feels that way. I was telling my one person that I can confide in and she was PISSED for me. Saying it’s very manipulative and mentally abusive. I absolutely respect her judgement and I can be a bit naive at times.
Thoughts?! Is she right? She knows him well so maybe there isn’t enough context here to judge. She has always thought he was sort of manipulative.

its 7 yr i marriage to my husband and he still fight with me. He always want flight on any topic like politics world and cleaning and cooking. I have two toddler he never help me in anything except finance and give us house to stay . We don't have any support from his family as they don't care. Now he want me to get out of his house and take kids with me. I asked to file divorce but me said yiu file it. As i don't have such money to handle lawyer. I earn little bit i cant afford rental with other expenses. He torcher me mentally a lots. I don't have friends and as i never step out for work. I don't know how to handle two kids and work and house alone. Please help.

Been together almost 20 years. Female in her 40s and male just about to leave his 40s. We had a fantastic intimate life up until about two and a half years ago. All of a sudden our private intimate life came to a hault. When I would bring up the topic, I was met with "give me a few days to find my words", I'd sit for those days with the heaviness on my chest. I would bring up the topic again and express how this is making me feel and again I would be met with "let me find my words". Eventually he would say "it's not you, I'm all up in my head, I do love and desire you" and then nothing. I broke down last summer, showed him my tears, again I was met with "give me a few days to find my words" and I would. Then he'd say again "It's not you. I'm all up in my head". I have tried to be understanding, I've tried to "spice things up", I've tried to bring back things we used to love. Nothing. There is no physical cheating going on, he still holds my hand, hugs and kisses me, but nothing more. I want to scream! I love this man with every part of my being, but I'm getting resentful, jealous over other females, and I feel so lonely. I'm lost. Why am I no longer desirable to my husband? My selt esteem has never felt so low.

So my significant other & I are getting married this summer.
A small back story, his mom/step dad is a drunk & chain smoke in the home. In the 8 years we have been together they have never been over to see any of our homes, or the one we purchased.
They don’t see our kids one biological not his but he’s her dad. Our son was born a year ago and they tried once unannounced to show up and got told no.
Now that we are trying to plan he said he wants to have them there but I don’t. And I’m not sure how to bring this up. Yes it’s his mother but I am also a mother to my kids who we don’t allow absent people/ people who aren’t actively interested in the kids or our lives.
We are having a small wedding my parents & grandparents & a handleful of close friends. As we feel we don’t need a big wedding it’s about us as a family.
I guess I’m just not sure how to bring this up.

Girlies, i have a question about how yall would deal with this.. please let me know your opinions, im struggling. 🩷

So my boyfriend runs a business that involves people from across the country. He doesn’t work it, instead he has people that work for him basically selling the product. They work Weekends normally all over the country. Friday-Sunday. He accommodates their stay, rentals, etc. For the past 2 years, they have stayed in his parents backyard in a building. His parents have a house and this space outside that they can stay in.. However, for the past couple months it has became an issue. Now that it has became a issue , he wants me to be okay with allowing 4 grown men into my home, my safe space, my peace mind you we have 3 bedrooms, 2 baths. One is his bathroom, One is mine. We have one guest room that’s my makeup room, and i am currently pregnant so the other room is going to be a nursery. We simply don’t have room for 4 grown men, besides it would make me completely uncomfortable and anxoious in my own home. He is upset and saying i only care about myself, but i don’t understand. If i knew this was going to be something, we would’ve had a discussion prior to us ever living together. what would yall do? am i in the wrong? help

No matter how hard life gets, I don't care. I will never lose my faith in God. Amen

I’m currently working at a jail and constantly doing overtime to provide for my family and take care of bills/ debt. Every two weeks I work 120 to 130 hours to pay off debt , pay bills and support my wife and three kids (9,7,3). I always pay bills on time, have a 4 bedroom house, take vacations to time to time, and feel like i support my family well.My wife is Chinese and comes from a an extremely well off background where her parents owned business make a great deal of money and constantly give her large sums of money. My wife who’s stay at home doesn’t like to teach the children, stating it’s the schools job, even though both of the kids cant read or or write, gets upset every time I tell her we have to wait to get something so I just let her put it on credit to avoid argument, and gets upset everytime when we do go out that she has to contribute 20 or 40 on outing for snacks even though constantly getting extra income from family. Everytime I try to talk to her she screams calls me poor, a bad provider , a horrible father ( yet every day I’m off I spend taking the kids to parks or events, calls me slow, retarded ( head injury from military and learning disability’s) , bring up every thing from the past ,and just screams at me till I agree with her. I’m currently at the point where everything ends in argument even small issues, she uses the threat of divorce as a weapon, and I have anxiety attacks. I currently spend a lot of extra time at work doing extra overtime since work is peaceful. I don’t know what to do. I’ve been married for almost ten years and don’t even want to celebrate as I’m so dead inside. Is this relationship salvageable? Please keep in mind I’ve had plenty of talks already. Is

Hey, so I have been married for 7 years now. We are expecting our 4th child soon I’m 20 weeks pregnant.

My husband texted me yesterday saying I don’t find him attractive because we haven’t had sex in 6 days. I didn’t know how to respond. We just had a family vacation that was 5 days and we been home for 2 days and I been resting for one and been back to work. Sex is honestly not my biggest thing no more. Kids are 8,7 and 5 we have sports they the week, I have dinner to be made after work and homework and comes home by 6-7pm I be exhausted sex don’t be on my mind but it’s important to him. I told him if he don’t bring it up in bed I can go weeks without it.

Help. We’ve been married for almost a year now, and there’s an issue that keeps coming up between us. I honestly don’t know what to do anymore. I need some enlightenment — maybe to better understand him, or to know if I’m just overreacting to the little details.

For context, my husband comes from a family of eight. He’s the only one who’s married so far. Most of his siblings, especially the eldest, are still supporting their parents — not just for their needs, but even for their wants.

When we got married, I believed that open communication would be key to a strong partnership. That’s why I always made an effort to be transparent with him. I told him that “what’s mine is yours,” and I hoped we would apply that both ways — especially when it comes to our finances.

But the problem is, whenever his parents ask for something, I’m always the last to know — or I just happen to read it by accident. At first, I didn’t mind, since we both have stable jobs and we’re earning our own income. But as time passed, I began to feel that these things should be discussed between us. At the very least, I thought I should be informed.

Whenever I try to talk to him about it, he always cuts me off and says, “Para ra man ni sa akong ginikanan” — as if I’m complaining about him giving. But I’m not. I’m not questioning the act of giving. What hurts is that I wasn’t even informed, consulted, or made part of the decision.

We’re married now. I thought we’re supposed to act as one. But every time this happens, I feel like I don’t matter. It’s always just between them — his mom asking for this, that, and more — and I’m completely out of the loop. It’s as if he’s not married at all.

And when I try to open up and suggest we talk things through calmly, he turns it into a bigger issue. He always says it’s easy for me to say those things because I don’t have any problems with my own family. But that’s not the point. I’m not comparing. I just want us to be united and to respect each other as partners.

hello, i am posting to gain some male perspective and women perspective if you’ve experienced the same. I want to start by saying my husband and I are both Christian and our faith is very important to us

anyways, my husband expressed to me a few days ago that he would like to have sex everyday . i am not an overtly sexual person. don’t get me wrong, our sex is great, I just truly don’t ever feel like i need it everyday. I never have. i’m a stay at home mom to a clingy teething 1 year old, i do 98% of housework and cooking, which is fine with me. he is a great husband father and provider. he doesn’t just “never help” but sometimes i feel like i hardly get a break and truthfully im just tired. I don’t like feeling like sex is a chore, i want to be into it.

we used to have sex maybe once a week, but i realized that really wasn’t fair to him, so i would now we have sex every other day to every 2 days, which is a lot for me, but i am trying not to be selfish. Whenever he helps me out around the house, i always can tell it’s because he wants some and then when he does help it’s very lazily . or for example, he will wash the dishes but ask me to put them away( even though i’m sweeping and doing counters). or he’ll fold the clothes and ask me to put them up . mind you he doesn’t help that often and when he does he always wants me to help him so he can get done faster. idk it’s not the worst thing in the world but it does kind of irritate me. why offer to help if you’re going to only do half the work

my question for men is how often do you want sex with your wife and how often do you help around the house? i truthfully do not view sex as an exchange , i want to make my partner happy in all ways, i guess sometimes it’s hard when im burnt out and i can tell he only helps so he can get what he wants

My husband’s “life stamina” bothers me. He can’t seem to keep up and maintain with everything life demands. He complains about being overweight, but never does anything to change it. He says he’s always tired but won’t do anything to fix it besides drinking several coffees a day. He hates how he hasn’t gotten where he wanted to be in life at this point, but never goal sets.

I’ve tried the “you change and maybe he’ll join you”, i work out M-F for a year now, i goal set and take daily steps to work towards them. Its hard but having an enjoyable life is worth the work. I have hypertension at 33 & i’ve taken steps to try to figure out why.

He complains to me & I am just sick of hearing it, knowing he doesn’t do anything to change. It’s classic self sabotage. Any advice?

I’m stuck in a situation in my own head that’s been messing with me for months. Im 20 and this is my 2nd relationship ive had.

Was I cheating or breaking trust?

I gave a girl my number so we couldd share our notes from classes we missed. I didnt tell my ex at the time because i thought it was innocent and nothing more.
(We only texted about classes and sometimes ask if we were going to show up to class that day) she saw a notification from her and looked through the texts and got upset with me. She said she was trying to flirt with me and i was oblivious to it. We went back and forth but we settled down and I was in the wrong for not telling my ex I gave my number out to a girl. But she said at the end it was okay to keep being friends and talking to her. 2 weeks go by and I decided to reach out to my classmate because I wasn’t in class and wanted to see if there were notes I missed. She keep trying to hold the conversation and I felt like maybe she was trying to flirt so I cut the conversation off and left her on read. I still didn’t tell my ex about it because I ended the connection before anything happened. Few days go by my ex finds out and breaks up with me for it. We been together for almost 2 years and I felt like us breaking up for something like that was just not a thought of my head a reason we could break up.

So was I cheating or did I break the trust we had.
I’ve been very understand on my part on how it made her feel and I empathized with her. But I still feel like I didn’t cheat, I’ve very against cheating and it keeps bugging me from time to time because she believes I cheated and would tell anyone about it.

I need some advice. I don’t know what to do anymore. I feel like all we do is argue or disagree. When I try to talk to him, he gets defensive, angry, or turns it around on me. We did a couple of sessions of counseling but it’s too expensive right now for our budget. I really feel like he doesn’t love me anymore. He ignores me most of the time but then get pissed off when I don’t initiate intimacy with him. Maybe I should just focus on myself, our daughter and just ignore him. Anyone have any advice? For some background, we had a rough year, he went to treatment a year ago for addiction, he was lying and being very dishonest in our marriage, and got fired back in January. I feel like we have one step forward and get knocked back ten. I really don’t want divorce but I want a happy marriage.