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The older I get, the more I realize that clinginess in a relationship isn’t cute. It’s suffocating. Like, relax. We don’t have to be texting all day, every day. We don’t have to be together 24/7. A healthy relationship doesn’t mean losing yourself to another person. It means growing together while still having your own life. Go out with your friends. Find a hobby. Chase your goals. Do something that doesn’t involve me. The biggest mistake people make in relationships is thinking their partner is supposed to be their entire source of happiness. No, that’s your responsibility. Happiness is an inside job. No relationship can thrive when one or both partners are emotionally dependent on the other for their sense of fulfillment. I love affection. I love deep connections. But I also love my peace, my independence, and my own space to breathe and recharge. And I refuse to feel guilty for that. We should complement each other, not complete each other because we should already be whole.
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I was at the fueling station earlier today. While on the queue, the Napep man beside me also on queue to the same pump was on call with his wife.
His phone had rang twice before he eventually picked. His wife mentioned that he didn’t drop any money for the children to eat, and in response, he said reminded her that he already told her he wanted to use the money left with him to buy fuel into his Keke so that he can work and send money. The call was audible as it was on speaker.
The worried wife kept mentioning that the children were already crying. But he kept telling his wife that he would send money immediately he works.
After the call, he was speaking with himself and talking how people weren’t going out as the normal days. With his eyes fixed at a particular spot of the keke.
I was so bothered for him, his wife and the hungry children.
When we got to the pump, the attendant could either sell to me or him as we were beside each other due to the position of our fuel tanks.
And he told the pump attendant to sell for me. I immediately told the attendant to sell for him.
“Oya, sell One thousand two hundred own”
While he stretched his hand to give the attendant the money.
Then I said young lady, Pls fill the tank of his keke”
He looked at me like, No, she shouldn’t as he doesn’t have that money to pay.
I told him not to worry, and that I will pay.
And he said, since I started driving this keke, I have never bought full tank.
With tears on his eyes, he went down and I carried him up.
After I bought mine and as I was driving out of the staton, I didn’t know he was waiting for me just outside the gate.
When I saw him, I stopped he couldn’t stop thanking me.
I simply told him, I overheard the call with his wife wish caught my emotions.
My parents taught me how to be kind to people. My dad would say, a help you render today is coming for you tomorrow.
One thousand two hundred can not feed husband and wife, let alone with the children.
I requested for his account details and sent him money. I equally asked him to call his wife and I spoke with her. When she sent her details, I sent her money to buy some food stuffs.
He was literally in tears as I drove off, and I prayed for them that God eases their affairs.
And the one reason why I share this— If life is kind to you, Pls extend it and be kind to people.
Oluwanishola AkejuI was at the fueling station earlier today. While on the queue, the Napep man beside me also on queue to the same pump was on call with his wife. His phone had rang twice before he eventually picked. His wife mentioned that he didn’t drop any money for the children to eat, and in response, he said reminded her that he already told her he wanted to use the money left with him to buy fuel into his Keke so that he can work and send money. The call was audible as it was on speaker. The worried wife kept mentioning that the children were already crying. But he kept telling his wife that he would send money immediately he works. After the call, he was speaking with himself and talking how people weren’t going out as the normal days. With his eyes fixed at a particular spot of the keke. I was so bothered for him, his wife and the hungry children. When we got to the pump, the attendant could either sell to me or him as we were beside each other due to the position of our fuel tanks. And he told the pump attendant to sell for me. I immediately told the attendant to sell for him. “Oya, sell One thousand two hundred own” While he stretched his hand to give the attendant the money. Then I said young lady, Pls fill the tank of his keke” He looked at me like, No, she shouldn’t as he doesn’t have that money to pay. I told him not to worry, and that I will pay. And he said, since I started driving this keke, I have never bought full tank. With tears on his eyes, he went down and I carried him up. After I bought mine and as I was driving out of the staton, I didn’t know he was waiting for me just outside the gate. When I saw him, I stopped he couldn’t stop thanking me. I simply told him, I overheard the call with his wife wish caught my emotions. My parents taught me how to be kind to people. My dad would say, a help you render today is coming for you tomorrow. One thousand two hundred can not feed husband and wife, let alone with the children. I requested for his account details and sent him money. I equally asked him to call his wife and I spoke with her. When she sent her details, I sent her money to buy some food stuffs. He was literally in tears as I drove off, and I prayed for them that God eases their affairs. And the one reason why I share this— If life is kind to you, Pls extend it and be kind to people. Oluwanishola Akeju1 Kommentare 0 Geteilt 64 Ansichten1
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I marry early, just 20 years old.
My husband na 24 that time.
We love ourself well-well.
E no even reach one month for our marriage, I don carry belle.
We happy as young couple wey dey expect their first pikin. We prepare everything down for the baby.
But na for delivery room my joy begin turn to pain.
I labour for almost 3 days.
When I finally born, na baby boy, but the baby come weak.
Two hours later, my pikin d!e.
I cry tire.
My husband too cry.
But we encourage ourself say, "We go try again."
Six months later, I carry belle again.
After 9 months — another stillbirth.
Third belle, the same thing happen.
Na so my family say, “This marriage no be for you. Come out, go complete your university.”
But I refuse. I love my husband. I believe say better go still happen.
Some people say na spiritual matter.
We begin waka from church to prophet, prayer upon prayer.
Prophet assure us say “This time, e go work.” I carry belle again, the fourth one.
I born the baby, the baby even cry small, but by evening the baby d!e.
Doctor call am “sudden infant death.” No explanation. Just fear.
Na that period doctor advise say make we give gap before we try again.
I tell my husband make we try adopt for now.
Him agree.
I call my cousin wey say she dey work for one motherless home. We give her over 1.6 million. Na so she dupe us carry money vanish.
My husband vex.
Say him no even believe for adoption before, na just to please me. Him say make I no ask am money again.
I begin follow the matter spiritually again.
Different prophecies, no solution.
One day, my friend tell me about one doctor for East wey young girls dey born give away babies for money.
Baby Boy na 1.5 million, girl na 1 million.
She say e legit.
I tell my husband, he say, "I no dey interestedand i no get any money to bring out."
I go borrow money.
I give my friend 600k as first payment.
One week later, na online I see video of my friend—dem dey beat her say she thief her neighbor pikin wan carry come give me.
I shock.
My heart cut.
I run go show my husband. He say, "Better no involve me for this matter"
Next day, police land arrest me.
My husband say, “Follow them go. I go get lawyer.”
I call my family, dem say, “As you no hear word when we try rescue you, make Love bail you out now.”
Just like play, I land prison.
No lawyer.
No family.
My husband visit me only 3 times. After that, silence.
My friend wey thief the baby, her people raise money bail her.
She promise to help me too. Nothing happen.
I stay 5 years for prison for matter I no understand finish.
Just because say I want born, just because say I no get patience, just because say I trust wrong people.
Different NGO dey come prison.
Dem go give us food, tissue, pad — and hope.
Many promise to help me after I share my story. But nothing come out.
Until one day, one woman wey be women advocate listen to me.
She promise to help. I no believe, but she really help me comot from jail.
When I reach house, my husband don move.
Don remarry with three children already.
When I go see am, him say make I find peace. Say our fate no match.
That day, I wan just disappear. I tell the woman wey help me. She say, “Come stay with me.”
She encourage me. Enrol me back for catering school make I refresh my baking skills.
From there I start my small baking business.
But inside me, I still dey cry.
I no even fit look mirror.
I don lose shape, lose beauty, lose hope.
One day, I go deliver wedding cake.
As i reach the venue the people bounce me — say I no fit enter because I look “dirty.” That day, I cry reach house.
I tell myself, “I go change this story.”
I download Pinterest app, dey learn how to dress my body type.
I watch make-up beginners videos.
I start to buy small affordable good clothes.
I begin dey apply simple makeup.
I switch to skin care wey dey moisturize my skin.
I begin see my beauty again.
Customers begin notice.
Begin compliment me.
I start dey take pictures. I start dey smile.
My self-confidence begin return.
One day, I go deliver cake again.
I dress well.
The bride say I fine. Na there one man collect my number, say na for business.
But na love him come find.
Him fine, young, tall — and kind.
I open up tell am everything.
He say, “Your past no be your name.
Let’s build something new.”
Today, I don marry again.
I don born two boys through CS operation.
Dem survive.
My first son na 4 years, second one 2 years.
My husband say no need to born again — these ones complete us. And truly, I no need anything else again.
I don finally become mama.
Today I dey grateful say After all my tough challenges God still change my story.
---
To every woman wey don carry belle with joy but return house empty-handed — this message na for you.
The pain of stillbirth no be small thing.
Na one deep wound wey only God fit understand.
Sometimes you go dey ask, “Why me?” Sometimes the silence go loud, the tears go come uninvited.
But make you hear this one: you never fail.
Your womb no betray you.
Your heart still be the heart of a mother.
And even if the world no see your kind of pain, God see am, and He go still comfort you in ways wey go shock you.
To the women wey don lose their self-esteem because dem no get money take take care of their body, or childbirth don change the way dem look —
My sister, remember say your beauty no end for body.
Start small, love yourself again, dress well, start with your budget, manage your weight if necessary.
Self love dey build back self esteem
You go rise again and glow in your own time.
To the women wey their husband don abandon them —
No carry your life hang for one person wey walk away.
God never walk away from you.
Stand up, dust your pain, start again.
Look good, take care of yourself.
You still fit laugh again, love again, and shine again.
To Every Woman and Family wey dey fight silent battles —
May God surprise you with joy wey go wipe all your secret tears.
Amen.
@highlightI marry early, just 20 years old. My husband na 24 that time. We love ourself well-well. E no even reach one month for our marriage, I don carry belle. We happy as young couple wey dey expect their first pikin. We prepare everything down for the baby. But na for delivery room my joy begin turn to pain. I labour for almost 3 days. When I finally born, na baby boy, but the baby come weak. Two hours later, my pikin d!e. I cry tire. My husband too cry. But we encourage ourself say, "We go try again." Six months later, I carry belle again. After 9 months — another stillbirth. Third belle, the same thing happen. Na so my family say, “This marriage no be for you. Come out, go complete your university.” But I refuse. I love my husband. I believe say better go still happen. Some people say na spiritual matter. We begin waka from church to prophet, prayer upon prayer. Prophet assure us say “This time, e go work.” I carry belle again, the fourth one. I born the baby, the baby even cry small, but by evening the baby d!e. Doctor call am “sudden infant death.” No explanation. Just fear. Na that period doctor advise say make we give gap before we try again. I tell my husband make we try adopt for now. Him agree. I call my cousin wey say she dey work for one motherless home. We give her over 1.6 million. Na so she dupe us carry money vanish. My husband vex. Say him no even believe for adoption before, na just to please me. Him say make I no ask am money again. I begin follow the matter spiritually again. Different prophecies, no solution. One day, my friend tell me about one doctor for East wey young girls dey born give away babies for money. Baby Boy na 1.5 million, girl na 1 million. She say e legit. I tell my husband, he say, "I no dey interestedand i no get any money to bring out." I go borrow money. I give my friend 600k as first payment. One week later, na online I see video of my friend—dem dey beat her say she thief her neighbor pikin wan carry come give me. I shock. My heart cut. I run go show my husband. He say, "Better no involve me for this matter" Next day, police land arrest me. My husband say, “Follow them go. I go get lawyer.” I call my family, dem say, “As you no hear word when we try rescue you, make Love bail you out now.” Just like play, I land prison. No lawyer. No family. My husband visit me only 3 times. After that, silence. My friend wey thief the baby, her people raise money bail her. She promise to help me too. Nothing happen. I stay 5 years for prison for matter I no understand finish. Just because say I want born, just because say I no get patience, just because say I trust wrong people. Different NGO dey come prison. Dem go give us food, tissue, pad — and hope. Many promise to help me after I share my story. But nothing come out. Until one day, one woman wey be women advocate listen to me. She promise to help. I no believe, but she really help me comot from jail. When I reach house, my husband don move. Don remarry with three children already. When I go see am, him say make I find peace. Say our fate no match. That day, I wan just disappear. I tell the woman wey help me. She say, “Come stay with me.” She encourage me. Enrol me back for catering school make I refresh my baking skills. From there I start my small baking business. But inside me, I still dey cry. I no even fit look mirror. I don lose shape, lose beauty, lose hope. One day, I go deliver wedding cake. As i reach the venue the people bounce me — say I no fit enter because I look “dirty.” That day, I cry reach house. I tell myself, “I go change this story.” I download Pinterest app, dey learn how to dress my body type. I watch make-up beginners videos. I start to buy small affordable good clothes. I begin dey apply simple makeup. I switch to skin care wey dey moisturize my skin. I begin see my beauty again. Customers begin notice. Begin compliment me. I start dey take pictures. I start dey smile. My self-confidence begin return. One day, I go deliver cake again. I dress well. The bride say I fine. Na there one man collect my number, say na for business. But na love him come find. Him fine, young, tall — and kind. I open up tell am everything. He say, “Your past no be your name. Let’s build something new.” Today, I don marry again. I don born two boys through CS operation. Dem survive. My first son na 4 years, second one 2 years. My husband say no need to born again — these ones complete us. And truly, I no need anything else again. I don finally become mama. Today I dey grateful say After all my tough challenges God still change my story. --- To every woman wey don carry belle with joy but return house empty-handed — this message na for you. The pain of stillbirth no be small thing. Na one deep wound wey only God fit understand. Sometimes you go dey ask, “Why me?” Sometimes the silence go loud, the tears go come uninvited. But make you hear this one: you never fail. Your womb no betray you. Your heart still be the heart of a mother. And even if the world no see your kind of pain, God see am, and He go still comfort you in ways wey go shock you. To the women wey don lose their self-esteem because dem no get money take take care of their body, or childbirth don change the way dem look — My sister, remember say your beauty no end for body. Start small, love yourself again, dress well, start with your budget, manage your weight if necessary. Self love dey build back self esteem You go rise again and glow in your own time. To the women wey their husband don abandon them — No carry your life hang for one person wey walk away. God never walk away from you. Stand up, dust your pain, start again. Look good, take care of yourself. You still fit laugh again, love again, and shine again. To Every Woman and Family wey dey fight silent battles — May God surprise you with joy wey go wipe all your secret tears. Amen. @highlight0 Kommentare 0 Geteilt 125 Ansichten -
15 GOOD REASONS TO DATE MATURE WOMEN.
1: They hold better conversation.
2: They know what they want and they are straight forward about it.
3: They are generally more purpose driven and focus more on their career.
4:They are more appreciative of their relationship.
5: They are more passionate.
6: They are more romantic
7 They are more open to try new things.
8:They are more willing to be a team.
9:You can learn more from them.
10: knows pretty much how to spoil her man.
11: she is more domesticated at home.
12: she knows the importance of peace and quiet in the house.
13: she is more prone to protecting and covering up for the man during economic crisis.
14: She is Honest and very sincere.
15: She is more likely to stay for better or worse.
➥𝐼𝑓 𝑖𝑡'𝑠 ℎ𝑒𝑙𝑝𝑓𝑢𝑙 𝑝𝑙𝑒𝑎𝑠𝑒 𝑟𝑒𝑎𝑐𝑡 & 𝑠ℎ𝑎𝑟𝑒⇅
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