"I lost my mom at 12. A year later, my dad got married. She came with 2 kids, aged 14 a boy & a 16 year-old daughter. We lived together in the house, with me being the youngest.

I wasn't exactly maltreated, but I was being discriminated against by her children, who always got the best of everything. Growing up in that house was complicated. I did all the cooking & chores, which was a relief compared to what could have been worse - physical abuse. I ate daily meals, though not equally portioned like her kids - they got bigger pieces of meat and extra helpings. I convinced myself it was cuz I was the youngest.

However, my stepmom's behavior changed slightly when I started excelling in school. She would: Compare my grades to her daughters', Limit my study time, saying "house chores won't do themselves" Make subtle comments like "You think you're smarter than my girls?"
Despite this, I still respected her as my dad's wife and the mother of my household. Years passed, & my dad retired from his job. In a shocking move, he agreed with my stepmom to stop funding my education, citing "financial constraints. Despite that i was the most brilliant one in the house.

I was 22 & had to drop out of college to support myself & also helping stepmom in her restaurant business. That's when I met my husband - a rich, kind man who asked for my hand in marriage. My stepmom initially rejected him, saying I was "too young" & offered her older daughter instead. But he insisted on marrying me. When he approached dad, he agreed to our union. The day of my wedding, Stepmom called me into a private room & tearfully apologized for how she had treated me.

I forgave her, & we started Afresh. For over a year, we lived happily. She'd visit me often, helping with advice & support, especially when I became pregnant. Later on, after giving birth to my son, my stepmom visited, with the initial plan to stay with me for at least 6 months helping with nighttime feedings & caregiving tips. But 3 days ago something terrifying happened... While holding my 4-week-old b"by, my stepmom claimed she was "extremely sleepy" & accidentally dropped her. My son was rushed to the hospital, where doctors administered: Oxygen therapy, Phenobarbital to prevent any seizures. Thankfully, my baby is fine now...

A week before this incident, I walked into the kitchen to find my stepmom preparing my baby's bath water - it was scalding hot!. But all she could say was she "forgot" to test the temperature with her hand before putting the b"by in. Luckily, & thank God I intervened just in time, & my baby was unharmed. So now I'm really confused & consumed by doubts: If my stepmom's actions are truly accidental, or actually intentional or could it be just an act of carelessness & if i should still allow her to stay & help for the remaining 5 months, or could my bæby's safety be at risk? Please, help! kindly guide me through this.

"I lost my mom at 12. A year later, my dad got married. She came with 2 kids, aged 14 a boy & a 16 year-old daughter. We lived together in the house, with me being the youngest.

I wasn't exactly maltreated, but I was being discriminated against by her children, who always got the best of everything. Growing up in that house was complicated. I did all the cooking & chores, which was a relief compared to what could have been worse - physical abuse. I ate daily meals, though not equally portioned like her kids - they got bigger pieces of meat and extra helpings. I convinced myself it was cuz I was the youngest.

However, my stepmom's behavior changed slightly when I started excelling in school. She would: Compare my grades to her daughters', Limit my study time, saying "house chores won't do themselves" Make subtle comments like "You think you're smarter than my girls?"
Despite this, I still respected her as my dad's wife and the mother of my household. Years passed, & my dad retired from his job. In a shocking move, he agreed with my stepmom to stop funding my education, citing "financial constraints. Despite that i was the most brilliant one in the house.

I was 22 & had to drop out of college to support myself & also helping stepmom in her restaurant business. That's when I met my husband - a rich, kind man who asked for my hand in marriage. My stepmom initially rejected him, saying I was "too young" & offered her older daughter instead. But he insisted on marrying me. When he approached dad, he agreed to our union. The day of my wedding, Stepmom called me into a private room & tearfully apologized for how she had treated me.

I forgave her, & we started Afresh. For over a year, we lived happily. She'd visit me often, helping with advice & support, especially when I became pregnant. Later on, after giving birth to my son, my stepmom visited, with the initial plan to stay with me for at least 6 months helping with nighttime feedings & caregiving tips. But 3 days ago something terrifying happened... While holding my 4-week-old b"by, my stepmom claimed she was "extremely sleepy" & accidentally dropped her. My son was rushed to the hospital, where doctors administered: Oxygen therapy, Phenobarbital to prevent any seizures. Thankfully, my baby is fine now...

A week before this incident, I walked into the kitchen to find my stepmom preparing my baby's bath water - it was scalding hot!. But all she could say was she "forgot" to test the temperature with her hand before putting the b"by in. Luckily, & thank God I intervened just in time, & my baby was unharmed. So now I'm really confused & consumed by doubts: If my stepmom's actions are truly accidental, or actually intentional or could it be just an act of carelessness & if i should still allow her to stay & help for the remaining 5 months, or could my bæby's safety be at risk? Please, help! kindly guide me through this.

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"SHE GAVE YOU HER BODY, BUT TOOK YOUR DESTINY" – When sex is a transaction, the man always loses more.

There are two types of men in this world: those who build their future and those who trade it away for temporary pleasure. Many men don’t even realize when they’ve been robbed, not of their money, but of their potential.

She didn’t hold a gun to your head. She didn’t break into your house at night. But she walked away with your focus, your ambition, your discipline, and your financial future.

And the worst part? You willingly handed it over.

This is the silent robbery happening every day. Men think they are enjoying, but they are being emptied.

BRUTAL THREAD: How Se-x Can Steal Your Future

1. THE COST OF FREE SE-X IS YOUR AMBITION
You met a fine girl. She gave you her body for free. No stress, no commitment, just pure enjoyment. You thought you hit the jackpot? No, you entered the trap.

Each time you’re with her, you’re spending hours, days, and nights chasing pleasure instead of chasing progress.

You wake up late, you miss opportunities, your mind is distracted.

You thought you were enjoying her body, but she was taking your focus, your time, and your hunger for success.

2. EVERY TIME YOU SLEEP WITH HER, YOU LOSE ENERGY—SHE GAINS IT
There’s a reason great warriors, boxers, and kings of old practiced sexual discipline. They knew that their energy, clarity, and strength came from controlling their desires.

When you release carelessly, you are losing more than just fluid. You are losing drive, willpower, and aggression—all the things you need to dominate in life.

Now, check her: she is glowing, she is energized, she is more powerful.

You are weaker.

Why do you think they say "behind every successful man is a woman"? Because she collects his energy and multiplies it. But what happens when she takes your energy and leaves?

She goes to multiply it elsewhere.

3. SHE TOOK YOUR MONEY, BUT YOU THOUGHT IT WAS LØVE
At first, it was just small-small money—transport fare, lunch money, a little shopping. Then it became rent, hair, nails, and urgent 2K every week.

You thought you were investing in her? No, you were funding your own downfall.

She took your hard-earned money, but did she invest it back into you?

No.

She used it to look good for another man who had more focus than you.

4. SHE WASTED YOUR YEARS, NOW SHE'S GONE
How many men have given their prime years to a woman who had no plans of staying?

She took your time, your energy, your youth… then she moved on to the next best option.

Now, you’re in your 30s or 40s, starting over while she has already secured her next destination.

Reality check: A woman’s time is shorter, but a man’s wasted time is costlier.

5. YOU THOUGHT SHE WAS LOYAL, BUT YOU WERE JUST A PHASE
Some women are seasonal lovers—they attach themselves to a man for a period, take what they need, then move on.

You thought she was forever. She knew she was temporary.

You were just a “right now” guy. And when she found a "forever" guy, she walked away without looking back.

6. YOUR FUTURE IS MORE VALUABLE THAN HER BODY
Many men have traded their destiny for a few minutes of pleasure.

Ask Samson. He had superhuman strength. Delilah used love and sex to take it away.

Ask Solomon. The wisest king in history lost his throne because of vvomen.

Even great men fall when they don’t control their desires.

Now, look at yourself. What have you lost so far?

7. WAKE UP BEFORE IT'S TOO LATE
If you keep trading your time, energy, money, and focus for sex, you will wake up one day and realize:

The men you started life with are now ahead of you.

Your bank account is empty.

Your dreams never happened.

And the women who wasted your years are now with better men.

BOTTOM LINE:
Sex is not free. It is always a transaction.

Either you gain something from it, or you lose everything to it.

Choose wisely.

If this post hits you, you know what to do.
#everyoneシ゚

The Day a Parent $lapp€d a Teacher — And the School Asked Him to Apologize” By Uche

I will never forget that day.

It happened in one of the schools I once worked. A male teacher — calm, humble, and highly disciplined — had a mild issue with a student. The boy had mi$behaved, and as expected, the teacher corrected him firmly.

Later that evening, the boy went home and told his mother.

The next morning, the gates of the school hadn’t even opened fully when the mother stormed in like a w0unded lion. She pushed the gate man aside, barged into the school compound, and went straight for the teacher.

She didn’t ask questions.
She didn’t wait to hear his side.
She raised her hand — and $lapped him. Not once. Twice.

Two hot, di$respectful $lap$… delivered by a mother.
To a man.
To a teacher.
In front of students.

I was there. I saw it. I felt it. And till today, I don’t know how that teacher remained calm.

Because if it were me, I don’t think I would have survived that moment with silence. I don’t think my body would have obeyed the command to stand still. But he stood still — not out of weakness, but out of something even deeper: dignity.

You think that’s the worst part? No.

When the case got to the school owner’s office, we expected justice. We expected the teacher to be defended.

Instead, the owner begged the parent — and then turned to the teacher and said:

“Just apologize… let’s end it here.”

Apologize?
Apologize… for being s$lapped?
Apologize… for doing his job?
Apologize… for being a teacher?

That day, I felt something inside me break.
I saw a man stripped of his dignity and asked to clap for it.
I saw a teacher publicly humiliated — not just by a parent, but by the very system that should have protected him.

We are teachers. And we deserve respect.

This generation will not believe that this happened in Nigeria! Nigeria we hail thee!!

A PASTOR'S BETRAYAL
PART 3
Grace stood in the kitchen, her hands shaking as she stared at the text on her phone. It was from Michael—short, cold, like always.
"Working late. Don’t wait up."
She had spent all afternoon preparing his favorite meal—peppered snail soup with fresh bread. The table was set, candles lit, the house smelling of spices and warmth. She had wanted to talk, to finally tell him how lonely she felt. How much she missed him.
But now, the food would go cold. Again.
Her fingers hovered over her phone. She wanted to type, "Please come home. We need to talk." But she knew what his response would be—silence. Or worse, annoyance.
She took a deep breath and called him instead.
The phone rang three times before Michael answered. In the background, she could hear laughter, glasses clinking. A restaurant.
"Grace, I said I’m working," he muttered, his voice tight with irritation.
Her heart pounded. "You’re not at the office."
A pause. Then a sigh. "I had a business dinner. I didn’t think I needed to explain every little thing to you."
Little thing. Those words cut deep. To her, it wasn’t little. It was another night alone. Another night where she felt invisible in her own marriage.
"Michael…" Her voice cracked. "I made dinner. I wanted us to talk. We—we can’t keep living like this."
Another pause. Then, "Grace, not now. I’ll be home late."
And just like that, he hung up.
Grace stood there, the phone still pressed to her ear, the dial tone buzzing like a taunt.
When Michael finally came home, hours later, Grace was waiting.
The candles had burned out. The food was untouched.
He walked in, loosening his tie, barely glancing at her as he headed for the stairs.
"Michael," she said, her voice trembling. "We need to talk."
He stopped, exhaling sharply. "Grace, it’s midnight. Can’t this wait?"
No. It couldn’t.
"Every time I try to talk to you, you push me away," she whispered, tears spilling over. "Do you even love me anymore?"
Michael turned, his face unreadable. "This again? Grace, I’m tired. I work all day, and I don’t need this drama when I come home."
Drama.
That word shattered something inside her.
"This isn’t drama!" she cried. "This is our marriage! You don’t talk to me, you don’t spend time with me—I feel like a ghost in my own house!"
Michael’s jaw tightened. "What do you want from me, Grace? I provide for you. You have everything!"
Everything except his love.
Grace wiped her tears, her breath coming in shaky gasps. "I want my husband back."
For a second, something flickered in Michael’s eyes—guilt? Regret? But then it was gone, replaced by cold indifference.
"I don’t have time for this," he said, turning away.
And just like that, he walked upstairs, leaving her standing there, broken.
Grace didn’t sleep that night.
By morning, her eyes were swollen, her heart raw. She needed someone to talk to. Someone who would listen.
So she went back to the only person who seemed to care—Pastor Gideon.
In his office, Grace cried as she told him what happened.
Pastor Gideon listened, nodding sympathetically. Then he leaned forward, his voice grave.
"Sister Grace… I fear for your life."
Grace froze. "What?"
He sighed, shaking his head. "A man who treats his wife this way… it’s not just neglect. It’s spiritual warfare. The devil is using him to destroy you."
Grace’s hands trembled. "But—but what do I do?"
Pastor Gideon placed a hand over hers. "God is telling me… if you stay, you will die in that house. Not just your heart—your life."
Grace gasped, her blood running cold.
"The Bible says, ‘Come out from among them and be separate.’ You must leave, Sister Grace. Before it’s too late."
Her mind spun. Leave Michael? After eighteen years?
But the pastor’s words sank deep, feeding her fears.
You will die if you stay.
That evening, Pastor Gideon "coincidentally" ran into Michael at a charity event.
"Brother Michael!" he greeted warmly, clapping him on the back. "How are you, my friend?"
Michael, unaware of the pastor’s conversations with Grace, smiled. "Doing well, Pastor. Keeping busy."
The pastor sighed sympathetically. "I actually wanted to speak with you. Your wife came to me recently… she’s been struggling."
Michael’s smile faded. "Grace?"
Pastor Gideon nodded. "She’s… very emotional. I’ve been counseling her to find peace in God’s word. Marriage is sacred, after all."
Michael relaxed, grateful. "I appreciate that, Pastor. She’s been… difficult lately."
The pastor smiled, hiding his deceit behind holy concern. "We’ll keep praying for you both."
Meanwhile, Grace sat at home, staring at her wedding ring, wondering if removing it would save her life—or destroy it.
TO BE CONTINUED...

"You’re leaving this house. And I don’t want you to come back."

That was all he heard.

There was no argument.
No shouting.
Just a dry sentence… and a door closing.

His grandmother.
The same woman who had raised him since he was a child… was now throwing him out as if he were a stranger.

His grandfather, witnessing the scene, was stunned.
“What are you doing? Why are you throwing him out like that? He’s your grandson!”

But she didn’t say another word.
She just turned around and disappeared into the house.

He didn’t understand.
Neither did the neighbors.
No one understood.

The boy, aimless, started walking.
He was wearing the same clothes he had on when he went to the store that afternoon.

No money. No phone. No keys.

First, he went to a friend.
“Do you have a place to stay?” the friend asked.
“No… they kicked me out.”
“Damn… I’m sorry. But my parents don’t let anyone stay over.
And honestly… I can’t do anything for you.”

He kept walking.
Another friend saw him coming.
“Everything okay? Something happen?”
“I have no place to go. Can I stay with you for a few days?”
“And what are you going to do here? You don’t have money? You can’t pay for anything?”
“No… nothing.”
“Then I’m sorry. You can’t stay at my place.”
The boy lowered his head.
And left.

He looked for his girlfriend.
He hugged her and explained what had happened.
She was worried, went to talk to her parents… and came back with a muted voice.
“They say you can’t stay. And I… I can’t do anything either.
I’m sorry, love… but this just isn’t going to work. Not like this.”

And he was left alone.
Completely alone.
He sat on a sidewalk bench and looked at the sky.
He had given everything for people who now gave him nothing.

Hours passed.
And when he thought no one was going to come looking for him…

His grandfather appeared.
“Let’s go home,” he said.
He didn’t want to.
“For what? So you can throw me out again?”
“Please, trust me. Just come.”

He got in the car.
Total silence the whole way.
When they arrived, his grandmother ran out to hug him.

He stepped back.
Then the grandfather sat him down and spoke calmly:
“Your grandmother didn’t do it out of cruelty. She did it out of love.
She wanted you to see with your own eyes… who stands by you only when you have something to offer.

You thought you were surrounded by friends.
You believed you had a solid relationship.
But she saw things you didn’t want to see.
People who used you, who took advantage of you… who were there only when you gave, but not when you needed.”

“And she had to make you see the truth.”
The boy began to cry.

The grandmother came closer.
“It broke my heart to do it… but I love you too much to let you keep believing a lie.”
He hugged her.

Tightly. Like he did when he was a child.
And he understood something that can’t be taught with words.

Moral:
Sometimes, the person who loves you most is the one brave enough to shake you… to open your eyes.
Because when you have something, everyone comes around.
But when you have nothing, you discover who’s truly worth it.
Who loves you… not for what you give, but for who you are.
And that truth, even if it hurts, makes you stronger.

This is what happened to my Salah Ram

*5 WAYS TO COMMUNICATE BETTER WITH YOUR PARTNER*



James 1:19 My dear brothers, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry,

A lady complained to me about how her husband rarely listens to her.

She said that anytime she wants to talk with her husband, it's either he is watching TV or he is using his phone.

When she requests his full attention, he will say that she should say what she wants to say, that he's hearing her.

This had happened for several years in their marriage, and she was very sad about it.

During my session with both partners, I decided to find out why he was doing that.

I asked him several questions and discovered that he had seen his parents live that way in his growing up years. So he grew up thinking that that's the right way for a husband to live and interact with his wife..

During my counselling session with them, I shared several tips with them on how to communicate better as couples.

I shared with them something that many couples do not pay attention to - the way you communicate with your spouse is frequently a pattern you picked up in your growing up years from your parents and other adults that you lived with. Your spouse probably picked up some other communication pattern in their growing up years.

Communication is the heart of any successful relationship. Whether you're newly dating or have been married for years, the way you communicate can make or break the bond you share with your partner.

Unfortunately, like the couple whose story I shared, many couples struggle with expressing themselves effectively, leading to misunderstandings, resentment, and emotional distance.

The good news is that regardless of the communication pattern you were exposed to in your growing up years, improving your communication skills is possible!

Here are some of the ways you can communicate better with your partner and foster a deeper connection.

1. Listen to Understand, Not to Respond: Often, we listen to our partners with the intent to respond rather than understand. Active listening involves focusing entirely on what your partner is saying without interrupting or thinking of your reply. By doing this, you show empathy, which can strengthen emotional bonds and make your partner feel truly heard.

2. Be Clear and Direct: Beating around the bush or using passive-aggressive language can create confusion and tension in a relationship. Using passive-aggressive language is a pattern of indirectly expressing negative feelings instead of openly addressing them. So learn to be clear and direct about your thoughts, feelings, and needs. Use “I” statements instead of “You…” to avoid placing blame and encourage open dialogue.

3. Practice Patience: Not every conversation will be easy or comfortable. Learning to be patient with your partner, especially during difficult discussions, can make a huge difference. Give them the time and space to express themselves, and resist the urge to react impulsively. Sometimes, it’s best to take a break if things get too heated.

4. Use Non-verbal Communication: Words aren’t the only way to communicate. Non-verbal cues such as body language, eye contact, and touch can convey affection, concern, and attentiveness. A warm hug or holding hands during a conversation can reinforce emotional connection and make your partner feel supported.

5. Check-In Regularly: Life gets busy, and it’s easy for couples to drift apart if they don’t make time to check in with each other. Schedule regular conversations to talk about how you're feeling and what you both need. These check-ins can help prevent issues from piling up and strengthen your relationship over time.

Effective communication is an ongoing effort that requires practice, patience, and intentionality. It’s not just about what you say, but how you say it. Small shifts in communication habits can lead to a deeper connection and a happier partnership.

By the end of the session with me, this couple recognized where they are not doing well and apologized to each other.

Today, they are living happily and improving their communication skills.

"Monopoly Of Nonsense"!

A bomb as always from the erudite scholar and Theologian.

"IF I HAVE MY WAY I WILL SEIZE TO BE A NIGERIAN BECAUSE THERE'S NO SENSE OF NATIONHOOD". - Bishop Matthew Kukah.

Bishop Mathew Hassan Kukah speaks the truth to power.


His words:
"Anyone who thinks the Biafra agitation is a nuisance and irritating should know that it is not the collective aspiration of all Igbos but especially that no one has the monopoly of nusinace. Nuisance begets nuisance. When you stay with potash loaders you too will share in their dusty hair. It is in this country that the same standards are not held against all. Some can get away with anything but others cannot get away with something. I shudder at those who blame the agitators for agitating. Everyone knows what is good for them. If you don't know what is good for you then shut up and don't obstruct those who know what is good for them. If I have my way I will cease to be a Nigerian because there is no sense of nationhood. Those who have leverage over others use it to oppress them. Otherwise how can you explain the audacious impunity of a certain section of this country. They can intimidate everybody even a sitting president and get away with it. When GEJ was president he was literally harassed by this same people until they sent him packing and we thought they will be appeased. But a las we were mistaken!


Now how do I love a country where a murderous terrorist group like the herdsmen acclaimed even internationally as deadly is being openly defended by a govt. that wants my loyalty. Do you know as I make this comment, a first class Chief of Bokkos LGA in plateau state was murdered by a certain group of Fulanis almost a year now and no one has been arrested not to talk of prosecution; there are many villagers in my parish who cannot go to farm again except to farm their backyard because their farms have been forcefully annexed by their Fulani murderers; that in Bokkos a wife and a daughter can be taken away right before her husband or father and be repeatedly raped then released at the convenience of the barbaric Fulani tribesmen and no one dares talk; police will advise you to go and settle the matter through dialogue? I want independence from a country where terrorists are embraced and agitators are terrorized.


At the slightest excitement Hausa or Fulani man can kill you and get away with it; it has happened and continues to happen but when you gear up to defend yourself because security will not, then you are caught by the same security who will lecture you on how to be peaceful and law abiding. This country will end unless there is justice for all. Rubbish! I hate the lie that Nigeria is. Let's say the truth and die but it is what will set us free. Nigeria is negotiable to me the oppressed even if it's not to the oppressor and that is normal.

"The only right Nigerians concede to you is the right to agree with them" -


Bishop Matthew Kukah.

*I WAS FALSELY ACCUSED OF BEARING A FIREARM. - Pastor Paul Adefarasin*

During the Service on Sunday at the House on The Rock Headquarters, Pastor Paul Adefarasin addressed the accusations labeled at him for pointing a firearm at a content creator.

While addressing the congregation, he said, “I was falsely accused of pointing a firearm at an aggressive content creator who came within personal distance.” He further clarified, “I do not have a pistol license for a firearm. I do not carry a firearm; I pointed no firearm at anybody.”

He further said that what happened wasn't just a mere attack on a local Church or a pastor. It was an organized strategy of the forces of darkness. He explained that at the root of the incidence was an enticement of the enemy which always point to the love of money. ‘Click baiters are just looking for more money,’ he remarked.

According to him, it wasn't in their Church policy to dignify hate speech or false accusations. “We believe that God is bigger than that” - he stated. He quoted from Romans 12:19 “do not repay evil for evil.”

He also said he was shocked and hurt when people called and sent him different videos. He encouraged himself with the fact that God would always turn what the enemy meant for evil to work out for good.

He further said, people are always at the lookout for a time where one will get a little stumble, trip, fall or falter so they can use it against the person. “You can't be a pastor and not have to deal with that. That's the part of the price we pay” - he stated.

He concluded by saying, “learn something from the process and go forward because the enemy's objective is to stop you from doing what you are called to do.” “We are leaving the matter to God trusting Him to do what needs to be done. On this note, I will lay that matter to rest. Case closed.”