• Next Season TIME TABLE

    June 2025
    01 Transfer window opens
    10 Transfer window suspends
    15 Club World Cup starts
    16 Transfer window resumes
    18 EPL fixtures released

    July 2025
    08 UCL Qualifiers
    13 Club World Cup Final

    August 2025
    11 Carabao Round 1
    15 EPL season starts
    28 UCL League Stage draw

    September 2025
    01 Transfer window closes
    01   International Break
    16 UCL Matchday 1
    30 UCL Matchday 2

    Octobe2025
    06 International Break
    21 UCL Matchday 3

    November 2025
    04 UCL Matchday 4
    10 International Break
    25 UCL Matchday 5

    December 2025
    09 UCL Matchday 6
    21 AFCON starts

    January 2026
    01 Transfer window opens
    18 AFCON Final
    20 UCL Matchday 7
    28 UCL Matchday 8 (concurrent games)
    30 UCL Knockout Playoffs Draw

    February 2026
    02 Transfer window closes
    17 UCL Playoffs 1st Leg
    24 UCL Playoffs 2nd Leg
    27 UCL Round of 16 Draw

    March 2026
    10 UCL R16 1st Leg
    17 UCL R16 2nd Leg
    22 Carabao Final
    23 International Break

    April 2026
    07 UCL QF 1st Leg
    14 UCL QF 2nd Leg
    28 UCL SF 1st Leg

    May 2026
    05 UCL SF 2nd Leg
    20 Europa Final (Istanbul)
    24 Last day of sgveason (concurrent games)
    27 Conference Final (Leipzig)
    30 UCL Final (Budapest)

    June 2026
    11 FIFA World Cup 2026

    Next Season TIME TABLE 🤝 June 2025 ✅ 01 🪟 Transfer window opens 10 🪟 Transfer window suspends 15 🌎 Club World Cup starts 16 🪟 Transfer window resumes 18 📆 EPL fixtures released July 2025✅ 08 🥇 UCL Qualifiers 13 🌎 Club World Cup Final August 2025✅ 11 🏆 Carabao Round 1 15 ⚽ EPL season starts 28 🥇 UCL League Stage draw September 2025✅ 01 🪟 Transfer window closes 01 ✈️  International Break 16 🥇 UCL Matchday 1 30 🥇 UCL Matchday 2 Octobe2025✅ 06 ✈️ International Break 21 🥇 UCL Matchday 3 November 2025✅ 04 🥇 UCL Matchday 4 10 ✈️ International Break 25 🥇 UCL Matchday 5 December 2025✅ 09 🥇 UCL Matchday 6 21 🌍 AFCON starts January 2026✅ 01 🪟 Transfer window opens 18 🌍 AFCON Final 20 🥇 UCL Matchday 7 28 🥇 UCL Matchday 8 (concurrent games) 30 🥇 UCL Knockout Playoffs Draw February 2026✅ 02 🪟 Transfer window closes 17 🥇 UCL Playoffs 1st Leg 24 🥇 UCL Playoffs 2nd Leg 27 🥇 UCL Round of 16 Draw March 2026 ✅ 10 🥇 UCL R16 1st Leg 17 🥇 UCL R16 2nd Leg 22 🏆 Carabao Final 23 ✈️ International Break April 2026✅ 07 🥇 UCL QF 1st Leg 14 🥇 UCL QF 2nd Leg 28 🥇 UCL SF 1st Leg May 2026✅ 05 🥇 UCL SF 2nd Leg 20 🥈 Europa Final (Istanbul) 24 ⚽ Last day of sgveason (concurrent games) 27 🥉 Conference Final (Leipzig) 30 🥇 UCL Final (Budapest) June 2026 ✅ 11 🌎FIFA World Cup 2026
    0 Kommentare 0 Geteilt 62 Ansichten
  • Born on These 4 Dates? You're Destined for Wealth

    Numerology analyzes an individual’s behavior, characteristics, and career choices based on their birth date. The Life Path Number, derived from adding the digits of your birth date, plays a significant role in this analysis. Life Path Number 1 individuals are often seen as special, achieving notable success in both life and career.

    Lucky Birth Dates

    People born on the 1st, 10th, 19th, or 28th of any month have a Life Path Number of 1. This number is associated with the Sun’s energy, symbolizing confidence, leadership, and creativity. Those born on these dates are natural leaders.

    These individuals are confident, independent thinkers who draw others in with their unique personalities, leaving a lasting impression wherever they go. They embrace challenges and turn them into opportunities for success.

    However, their strong personalities can sometimes lead to stubbornness and arrogance. They may believe their way is the only correct way, occasionally overlooking the advice of others.

    Despite this, they have pure hearts and are always willing to help those in need. Their creativity often leads them to success in fields like art, writing, and other creative professions.

    Friendships and Relationships

    Life Path Number 1 individuals are loyal and respectful partners. While they deeply value their loved ones, they also cherish their independence within relationships. They expect mutual respect and understanding from their partners. However, their strong-willed nature, coupled with occasional stubbornness, may lead to conflicts. Maintaining balance and open communication is essential for a successful love life.

    Career Choices

    With ambitious goals, those with Life Path Number 1 are determined to achieve them. Careers that emphasize leadership, innovation, and independence are ideal. They excel in fields such as business, management, marketing, advertising, art, writing, and technology.

    Health

    While energetic and active, their dedication to their pursuits can lead to stress and fatigue. Practicing yoga, meditation, and regular exercise can help them maintain mental clarity. Their busy schedules might sometimes cause irregular eating habits, so it’s important for them to maintain a balanced diet and a healthy, active lifestyle.
    Born on These 4 Dates? You're Destined for Wealth Numerology analyzes an individual’s behavior, characteristics, and career choices based on their birth date. The Life Path Number, derived from adding the digits of your birth date, plays a significant role in this analysis. Life Path Number 1 individuals are often seen as special, achieving notable success in both life and career. Lucky Birth Dates People born on the 1st, 10th, 19th, or 28th of any month have a Life Path Number of 1. This number is associated with the Sun’s energy, symbolizing confidence, leadership, and creativity. Those born on these dates are natural leaders. These individuals are confident, independent thinkers who draw others in with their unique personalities, leaving a lasting impression wherever they go. They embrace challenges and turn them into opportunities for success. However, their strong personalities can sometimes lead to stubbornness and arrogance. They may believe their way is the only correct way, occasionally overlooking the advice of others. Despite this, they have pure hearts and are always willing to help those in need. Their creativity often leads them to success in fields like art, writing, and other creative professions. Friendships and Relationships Life Path Number 1 individuals are loyal and respectful partners. While they deeply value their loved ones, they also cherish their independence within relationships. They expect mutual respect and understanding from their partners. However, their strong-willed nature, coupled with occasional stubbornness, may lead to conflicts. Maintaining balance and open communication is essential for a successful love life. Career Choices With ambitious goals, those with Life Path Number 1 are determined to achieve them. Careers that emphasize leadership, innovation, and independence are ideal. They excel in fields such as business, management, marketing, advertising, art, writing, and technology. Health While energetic and active, their dedication to their pursuits can lead to stress and fatigue. Practicing yoga, meditation, and regular exercise can help them maintain mental clarity. Their busy schedules might sometimes cause irregular eating habits, so it’s important for them to maintain a balanced diet and a healthy, active lifestyle.
    0 Kommentare 0 Geteilt 68 Ansichten
  • I marry early, just 20 years old.
    My husband na 24 that time.

    We love ourself well-well.

    E no even reach one month for our marriage, I don carry belle.

    We happy as young couple wey dey expect their first pikin. We prepare everything down for the baby.

    But na for delivery room my joy begin turn to pain.

    I labour for almost 3 days.
    When I finally born, na baby boy, but the baby come weak.

    Two hours later, my pikin d!e.
    I cry tire.
    My husband too cry.

    But we encourage ourself say, "We go try again."

    Six months later, I carry belle again.
    After 9 months — another stillbirth.

    Third belle, the same thing happen.

    Na so my family say, “This marriage no be for you. Come out, go complete your university.”

    But I refuse. I love my husband. I believe say better go still happen.

    Some people say na spiritual matter.
    We begin waka from church to prophet, prayer upon prayer.

    Prophet assure us say “This time, e go work.” I carry belle again, the fourth one.

    I born the baby, the baby even cry small, but by evening the baby d!e.

    Doctor call am “sudden infant death.” No explanation. Just fear.

    Na that period doctor advise say make we give gap before we try again.

    I tell my husband make we try adopt for now.
    Him agree.

    I call my cousin wey say she dey work for one motherless home. We give her over 1.6 million. Na so she dupe us carry money vanish.

    My husband vex.
    Say him no even believe for adoption before, na just to please me. Him say make I no ask am money again.

    I begin follow the matter spiritually again.
    Different prophecies, no solution.

    One day, my friend tell me about one doctor for East wey young girls dey born give away babies for money.

    Baby Boy na 1.5 million, girl na 1 million.
    She say e legit.

    I tell my husband, he say, "I no dey interestedand i no get any money to bring out."

    I go borrow money.
    I give my friend 600k as first payment.

    One week later, na online I see video of my friend—dem dey beat her say she thief her neighbor pikin wan carry come give me.

    I shock.
    My heart cut.

    I run go show my husband. He say, "Better no involve me for this matter"

    Next day, police land arrest me.

    My husband say, “Follow them go. I go get lawyer.”

    I call my family, dem say, “As you no hear word when we try rescue you, make Love bail you out now.”

    Just like play, I land prison.
    No lawyer.
    No family.

    My husband visit me only 3 times. After that, silence.

    My friend wey thief the baby, her people raise money bail her.

    She promise to help me too. Nothing happen.

    I stay 5 years for prison for matter I no understand finish.

    Just because say I want born, just because say I no get patience, just because say I trust wrong people.

    Different NGO dey come prison.
    Dem go give us food, tissue, pad — and hope.

    Many promise to help me after I share my story. But nothing come out.

    Until one day, one woman wey be women advocate listen to me.

    She promise to help. I no believe, but she really help me comot from jail.

    When I reach house, my husband don move.
    Don remarry with three children already.

    When I go see am, him say make I find peace. Say our fate no match.

    That day, I wan just disappear. I tell the woman wey help me. She say, “Come stay with me.”

    She encourage me. Enrol me back for catering school make I refresh my baking skills.
    From there I start my small baking business.

    But inside me, I still dey cry.
    I no even fit look mirror.
    I don lose shape, lose beauty, lose hope.

    One day, I go deliver wedding cake.

    As i reach the venue the people bounce me — say I no fit enter because I look “dirty.” That day, I cry reach house.

    I tell myself, “I go change this story.”

    I download Pinterest app, dey learn how to dress my body type.

    I watch make-up beginners videos.
    I start to buy small affordable good clothes.

    I begin dey apply simple makeup.
    I switch to skin care wey dey moisturize my skin.

    I begin see my beauty again.

    Customers begin notice.
    Begin compliment me.

    I start dey take pictures. I start dey smile.

    My self-confidence begin return.

    One day, I go deliver cake again.
    I dress well.

    The bride say I fine. Na there one man collect my number, say na for business.

    But na love him come find.

    Him fine, young, tall — and kind.
    I open up tell am everything.

    He say, “Your past no be your name.
    Let’s build something new.”

    Today, I don marry again.
    I don born two boys through CS operation.

    Dem survive.
    My first son na 4 years, second one 2 years.

    My husband say no need to born again — these ones complete us. And truly, I no need anything else again.

    I don finally become mama.

    Today I dey grateful say After all my tough challenges God still change my story.

    ---

    To every woman wey don carry belle with joy but return house empty-handed — this message na for you.

    The pain of stillbirth no be small thing.

    Na one deep wound wey only God fit understand.

    Sometimes you go dey ask, “Why me?” Sometimes the silence go loud, the tears go come uninvited.

    But make you hear this one: you never fail.
    Your womb no betray you.

    Your heart still be the heart of a mother.

    And even if the world no see your kind of pain, God see am, and He go still comfort you in ways wey go shock you.

    To the women wey don lose their self-esteem because dem no get money take take care of their body, or childbirth don change the way dem look —

    My sister, remember say your beauty no end for body.

    Start small, love yourself again, dress well, start with your budget, manage your weight if necessary.

    Self love dey build back self esteem

    You go rise again and glow in your own time.

    To the women wey their husband don abandon them —

    No carry your life hang for one person wey walk away.

    God never walk away from you.

    Stand up, dust your pain, start again.
    Look good, take care of yourself.
    You still fit laugh again, love again, and shine again.

    To Every Woman and Family wey dey fight silent battles —

    May God surprise you with joy wey go wipe all your secret tears.
    Amen.

    #everyoneシ#woman #virals #marriage
    I marry early, just 20 years old. My husband na 24 that time. We love ourself well-well. E no even reach one month for our marriage, I don carry belle. We happy as young couple wey dey expect their first pikin. We prepare everything down for the baby. But na for delivery room my joy begin turn to pain. I labour for almost 3 days. When I finally born, na baby boy, but the baby come weak. Two hours later, my pikin d!e. I cry tire. My husband too cry. But we encourage ourself say, "We go try again." Six months later, I carry belle again. After 9 months — another stillbirth. Third belle, the same thing happen. Na so my family say, “This marriage no be for you. Come out, go complete your university.” But I refuse. I love my husband. I believe say better go still happen. Some people say na spiritual matter. We begin waka from church to prophet, prayer upon prayer. Prophet assure us say “This time, e go work.” I carry belle again, the fourth one. I born the baby, the baby even cry small, but by evening the baby d!e. Doctor call am “sudden infant death.” No explanation. Just fear. Na that period doctor advise say make we give gap before we try again. I tell my husband make we try adopt for now. Him agree. I call my cousin wey say she dey work for one motherless home. We give her over 1.6 million. Na so she dupe us carry money vanish. My husband vex. Say him no even believe for adoption before, na just to please me. Him say make I no ask am money again. I begin follow the matter spiritually again. Different prophecies, no solution. One day, my friend tell me about one doctor for East wey young girls dey born give away babies for money. Baby Boy na 1.5 million, girl na 1 million. She say e legit. I tell my husband, he say, "I no dey interestedand i no get any money to bring out." I go borrow money. I give my friend 600k as first payment. One week later, na online I see video of my friend—dem dey beat her say she thief her neighbor pikin wan carry come give me. I shock. My heart cut. I run go show my husband. He say, "Better no involve me for this matter" Next day, police land arrest me. My husband say, “Follow them go. I go get lawyer.” I call my family, dem say, “As you no hear word when we try rescue you, make Love bail you out now.” Just like play, I land prison. No lawyer. No family. My husband visit me only 3 times. After that, silence. My friend wey thief the baby, her people raise money bail her. She promise to help me too. Nothing happen. I stay 5 years for prison for matter I no understand finish. Just because say I want born, just because say I no get patience, just because say I trust wrong people. Different NGO dey come prison. Dem go give us food, tissue, pad — and hope. Many promise to help me after I share my story. But nothing come out. Until one day, one woman wey be women advocate listen to me. She promise to help. I no believe, but she really help me comot from jail. When I reach house, my husband don move. Don remarry with three children already. When I go see am, him say make I find peace. Say our fate no match. That day, I wan just disappear. I tell the woman wey help me. She say, “Come stay with me.” She encourage me. Enrol me back for catering school make I refresh my baking skills. From there I start my small baking business. But inside me, I still dey cry. I no even fit look mirror. I don lose shape, lose beauty, lose hope. One day, I go deliver wedding cake. As i reach the venue the people bounce me — say I no fit enter because I look “dirty.” That day, I cry reach house. I tell myself, “I go change this story.” I download Pinterest app, dey learn how to dress my body type. I watch make-up beginners videos. I start to buy small affordable good clothes. I begin dey apply simple makeup. I switch to skin care wey dey moisturize my skin. I begin see my beauty again. Customers begin notice. Begin compliment me. I start dey take pictures. I start dey smile. My self-confidence begin return. One day, I go deliver cake again. I dress well. The bride say I fine. Na there one man collect my number, say na for business. But na love him come find. Him fine, young, tall — and kind. I open up tell am everything. He say, “Your past no be your name. Let’s build something new.” Today, I don marry again. I don born two boys through CS operation. Dem survive. My first son na 4 years, second one 2 years. My husband say no need to born again — these ones complete us. And truly, I no need anything else again. I don finally become mama. Today I dey grateful say After all my tough challenges God still change my story. --- To every woman wey don carry belle with joy but return house empty-handed — this message na for you. The pain of stillbirth no be small thing. Na one deep wound wey only God fit understand. Sometimes you go dey ask, “Why me?” Sometimes the silence go loud, the tears go come uninvited. But make you hear this one: you never fail. Your womb no betray you. Your heart still be the heart of a mother. And even if the world no see your kind of pain, God see am, and He go still comfort you in ways wey go shock you. To the women wey don lose their self-esteem because dem no get money take take care of their body, or childbirth don change the way dem look — My sister, remember say your beauty no end for body. Start small, love yourself again, dress well, start with your budget, manage your weight if necessary. Self love dey build back self esteem You go rise again and glow in your own time. To the women wey their husband don abandon them — No carry your life hang for one person wey walk away. God never walk away from you. Stand up, dust your pain, start again. Look good, take care of yourself. You still fit laugh again, love again, and shine again. To Every Woman and Family wey dey fight silent battles — May God surprise you with joy wey go wipe all your secret tears. Amen. #everyoneシ゚ #woman #virals #marriage
    0 Kommentare 1 Geteilt 85 Ansichten
  • A LONG READ

    How do we choose the people we fall in love with?

    The Romantic answer is that our instincts naturally guide us to individuals who are kind and good for us.

    Love is a sort of ecstasy that descends when we feel ourselves in the presence of a benign and nourishing soul, who will answer our emotional needs, understand our sadness and strengthen us for the hard tasks of our lives.

    In order to locate our lover, we must let our instincts carry us along, taking care never to impede them through pedantic psychological analysis and introspection or else considerations of status, wealth or lineage.

    Our feelings will tell us clearly enough when we have reached our destiny. To ask someone with any degree of rigour why exactly they have chosen a particular partner is – in the Romantic world-view – simply an unnecessary and offensive misunderstanding of love: true love is an instinct that accurately and naturally settles on those with a capacity to make us happy.

    The Romantic attitude sounds warm and kind. Its originators certainly imagined that it would bring an end to the sort of unhappy relationships previously brokered by parents and society. The only difficulty is that our obedience to instinct has, very often, proved to be a disaster of its own.

    Respecting the special feelings we get around certain people in nightclubs and train stations, parties and websites and that Romanticism so ably celebrated in art appears not to have led us to be any happier in our unions than a Medieval couple shackled into marriage by two royal courts keen to preserve the sovereignty of a slice of ancestral land. ‘Instinct’ has been little better than ‘calculation’ in underwriting the quality of our love stories.

    Romanticism would not at this point, however, give up the argument quite so easily. It would simply ascribe the difficulties we often have in love to not having looked hard enough for that central fixture of Romantic reverie: the right person. This being is inevitably still out there (every soul must have its soulmate, Romanticism assures us), it is just that we haven’t managed to track them down – yet.

    So we must continue the search, with all the technology and tenacity necessary, and maybe, once the divorce has come through and the house has been sold, we’ll get it right. But there’s another school of thought, this one influenced by psychoanalysis, which challenges the notion that instinct invariably draws us to those who will make us happy.

    The theory insists that we don’t fall in love first and foremost with those who care for us in ideal ways, we fall in love with those who care for us in familiar ways. Adult love emerges from a template of how we should be loved that was created in childhood and is likely to be entwined with a range of problematic compulsions that militate in key ways against our chances of growth.

    We may believe we are seeking happiness in love, but what we are really after is familiarity. We are looking to re-create, within our adult relationships, the very feelings we knew so well in childhood – and which were rarely limited to just tenderness and care.

    The love most of us will have tasted early on was confused with other, more destructive dynamics: feelings of wanting to help an adult who was out of control, of being deprived of a parent’s warmth or scared of his or her anger, or of not feeling secure enough to communicate our trickier wishes.

    How logical, then, that we should as adults find ourselves rejecting certain candidates not because they are wrong but because they are a little too right – in the sense of seeming somehow excessively balanced, mature, understanding and reliable – given that in our hearts, such rightness feels foreign and unearned.

    We chase after more exciting others, not in the belief that life with them will be more harmonious, but out of an unconscious sense that it will be reassuringly familiar in its patterns of frustration. Psychoanalysis calls the process whereby we identify our partners ‘object choice’ – and recommends that we try to understand the factors semi-consciously governing our attractions in order to interrupt the unhealthier patterns that might be at play.

    Our instincts – our strong undercurrents of attraction and revulsion – stem from complicated experiences we had when we were far too young to understand them, and which linger in the antechambers of our minds.

    Psychoanalysis doesn’t wish to suggest that everything about our attractions will be deformed. We may have quite legitimate aspirations to positive qualities: intelligence, charm, generosity… But we are also liable to be fatefully drawn towards trickier tendencies: someone who is often absent, or treats us with a little disdain, or needs to be surrounded all the time by friends, or cannot master their finances.

    However paradoxical it can sound, without these tricky behaviours, we may simply not be able to feel passionate or tender with someone.

    Alternatively, we may have been so traumatised by a parental figure, we cannot approach any partner who shares qualities with them of any kind, even ones disconnected from their negative sides. We might in love be rigidly intolerant of anyone who is intelligent, or punctual or interested in science, simply because these were the traits of someone who caused us a great deal of difficulty early on.

    To choose our partners wisely, we need to tease out how our compulsions to suffering or our rigid flights from trauma may be playing themselves out in our feelings of attraction. A useful starting place is to ask ourselves (perhaps in the company of a large sheet of paper, a pen and a free afternoon) what sort of people really put us off.

    Revulsion and disgust are useful first guides because we are likely to recognize that some of the traits that make us shiver are not objectively negative and yet feel to us distinctly off-putting. We might, for example, sense that someone who asks us too much about ourselves, or is very tender or dependable, will seem extremely eerie and frightening.

    And we might equally well, along the way, recognize that a degree of cruelty or distance belong to an odd list of the things we appear genuinely to need in order to love. It can be tricky to avoid self-censorship here, but the point isn’t to represent ourselves as reassuring, predictable people, but to get to know the curious quirks of our own psyches.

    We’ll tend to find that some ostensibly pretty nice things are getting caught in our love filters: people who are eloquent, clever, reliable, sunny can set off loud alarms. This is vital knowledge. We should pause and try to fathom where the aversions come from, what aspects of our past have made it so hard for us to accept certain sorts of emotional nourishment.

    Each time we recognize a negative, we’re discovering a crucial association in our own minds: we’re alighting on an impossibility of love based on associations from the past projected onto the present. An additional way we can get at the associations which circulate powerfully in the less noticed corners of our brains is to finish stub-sentences, that invite us to respond to things that might charm or repel us about someone.

    We get to see our own reactions more clearly when we write things down without thinking too much about our answers, catching the mind’s unconscious at work.

    For instance, we can deliberately jot the first things that come into our heads when we read the following:
    • If I tell a partner how much I need them, they will…
    • When someone tells me they really need me, I…
    • If someone can’t cope, I…
    • When someone tells me to get my act together, I …
    • If I were to be frank about my anxieties …
    • If my partner told me not to worry, I’d…
    • When someone blames me unfairly, I …

    Our honestly described reactions are legacies. They are revealing underlying assumptions we have acquired about what love can look like. We may start to get a clearer picture that our vision of what we are looking for in another person might not be an especially good guide to our personal or mutual happiness.

    Examining our emotional histories, we see that we can’t be attracted to just anyone. Getting to know the past, we come to recognise our earlier associations for what they are: generalisations we formed – entirely understandably – on the basis of just one or, hugely impressive, examples.

    We’ve unknowingly turned some local associations into strict rules for relationships. Even if we can’t radically shift the pattern, it’s useful to know that we are carrying a ball and chain. It can make us more careful of ourselves when we feel overwhelmed by a certainty that we’ve met the one, after a few minutes chatting at the bar.

    Ultimately, we stand to be liberated to love different people to our initial ‘types’, because we find that the qualities we like, and the ones we very much fear, are found in different constellations from those we encountered in the people who first taught us about affection, long ago in a childhood we are starting at last to understand and free ourselves from.

    The Counsellor
    A LONG READ How do we choose the people we fall in love with? The Romantic answer is that our instincts naturally guide us to individuals who are kind and good for us. Love is a sort of ecstasy that descends when we feel ourselves in the presence of a benign and nourishing soul, who will answer our emotional needs, understand our sadness and strengthen us for the hard tasks of our lives. In order to locate our lover, we must let our instincts carry us along, taking care never to impede them through pedantic psychological analysis and introspection or else considerations of status, wealth or lineage. Our feelings will tell us clearly enough when we have reached our destiny. To ask someone with any degree of rigour why exactly they have chosen a particular partner is – in the Romantic world-view – simply an unnecessary and offensive misunderstanding of love: true love is an instinct that accurately and naturally settles on those with a capacity to make us happy. The Romantic attitude sounds warm and kind. Its originators certainly imagined that it would bring an end to the sort of unhappy relationships previously brokered by parents and society. The only difficulty is that our obedience to instinct has, very often, proved to be a disaster of its own. Respecting the special feelings we get around certain people in nightclubs and train stations, parties and websites and that Romanticism so ably celebrated in art appears not to have led us to be any happier in our unions than a Medieval couple shackled into marriage by two royal courts keen to preserve the sovereignty of a slice of ancestral land. ‘Instinct’ has been little better than ‘calculation’ in underwriting the quality of our love stories. Romanticism would not at this point, however, give up the argument quite so easily. It would simply ascribe the difficulties we often have in love to not having looked hard enough for that central fixture of Romantic reverie: the right person. This being is inevitably still out there (every soul must have its soulmate, Romanticism assures us), it is just that we haven’t managed to track them down – yet. So we must continue the search, with all the technology and tenacity necessary, and maybe, once the divorce has come through and the house has been sold, we’ll get it right. But there’s another school of thought, this one influenced by psychoanalysis, which challenges the notion that instinct invariably draws us to those who will make us happy. The theory insists that we don’t fall in love first and foremost with those who care for us in ideal ways, we fall in love with those who care for us in familiar ways. Adult love emerges from a template of how we should be loved that was created in childhood and is likely to be entwined with a range of problematic compulsions that militate in key ways against our chances of growth. We may believe we are seeking happiness in love, but what we are really after is familiarity. We are looking to re-create, within our adult relationships, the very feelings we knew so well in childhood – and which were rarely limited to just tenderness and care. The love most of us will have tasted early on was confused with other, more destructive dynamics: feelings of wanting to help an adult who was out of control, of being deprived of a parent’s warmth or scared of his or her anger, or of not feeling secure enough to communicate our trickier wishes. How logical, then, that we should as adults find ourselves rejecting certain candidates not because they are wrong but because they are a little too right – in the sense of seeming somehow excessively balanced, mature, understanding and reliable – given that in our hearts, such rightness feels foreign and unearned. We chase after more exciting others, not in the belief that life with them will be more harmonious, but out of an unconscious sense that it will be reassuringly familiar in its patterns of frustration. Psychoanalysis calls the process whereby we identify our partners ‘object choice’ – and recommends that we try to understand the factors semi-consciously governing our attractions in order to interrupt the unhealthier patterns that might be at play. Our instincts – our strong undercurrents of attraction and revulsion – stem from complicated experiences we had when we were far too young to understand them, and which linger in the antechambers of our minds. Psychoanalysis doesn’t wish to suggest that everything about our attractions will be deformed. We may have quite legitimate aspirations to positive qualities: intelligence, charm, generosity… But we are also liable to be fatefully drawn towards trickier tendencies: someone who is often absent, or treats us with a little disdain, or needs to be surrounded all the time by friends, or cannot master their finances. However paradoxical it can sound, without these tricky behaviours, we may simply not be able to feel passionate or tender with someone. Alternatively, we may have been so traumatised by a parental figure, we cannot approach any partner who shares qualities with them of any kind, even ones disconnected from their negative sides. We might in love be rigidly intolerant of anyone who is intelligent, or punctual or interested in science, simply because these were the traits of someone who caused us a great deal of difficulty early on. To choose our partners wisely, we need to tease out how our compulsions to suffering or our rigid flights from trauma may be playing themselves out in our feelings of attraction. A useful starting place is to ask ourselves (perhaps in the company of a large sheet of paper, a pen and a free afternoon) what sort of people really put us off. Revulsion and disgust are useful first guides because we are likely to recognize that some of the traits that make us shiver are not objectively negative and yet feel to us distinctly off-putting. We might, for example, sense that someone who asks us too much about ourselves, or is very tender or dependable, will seem extremely eerie and frightening. And we might equally well, along the way, recognize that a degree of cruelty or distance belong to an odd list of the things we appear genuinely to need in order to love. It can be tricky to avoid self-censorship here, but the point isn’t to represent ourselves as reassuring, predictable people, but to get to know the curious quirks of our own psyches. We’ll tend to find that some ostensibly pretty nice things are getting caught in our love filters: people who are eloquent, clever, reliable, sunny can set off loud alarms. This is vital knowledge. We should pause and try to fathom where the aversions come from, what aspects of our past have made it so hard for us to accept certain sorts of emotional nourishment. Each time we recognize a negative, we’re discovering a crucial association in our own minds: we’re alighting on an impossibility of love based on associations from the past projected onto the present. An additional way we can get at the associations which circulate powerfully in the less noticed corners of our brains is to finish stub-sentences, that invite us to respond to things that might charm or repel us about someone. We get to see our own reactions more clearly when we write things down without thinking too much about our answers, catching the mind’s unconscious at work. For instance, we can deliberately jot the first things that come into our heads when we read the following: • If I tell a partner how much I need them, they will… • When someone tells me they really need me, I… • If someone can’t cope, I… • When someone tells me to get my act together, I … • If I were to be frank about my anxieties … • If my partner told me not to worry, I’d… • When someone blames me unfairly, I … Our honestly described reactions are legacies. They are revealing underlying assumptions we have acquired about what love can look like. We may start to get a clearer picture that our vision of what we are looking for in another person might not be an especially good guide to our personal or mutual happiness. Examining our emotional histories, we see that we can’t be attracted to just anyone. Getting to know the past, we come to recognise our earlier associations for what they are: generalisations we formed – entirely understandably – on the basis of just one or, hugely impressive, examples. We’ve unknowingly turned some local associations into strict rules for relationships. Even if we can’t radically shift the pattern, it’s useful to know that we are carrying a ball and chain. It can make us more careful of ourselves when we feel overwhelmed by a certainty that we’ve met the one, after a few minutes chatting at the bar. Ultimately, we stand to be liberated to love different people to our initial ‘types’, because we find that the qualities we like, and the ones we very much fear, are found in different constellations from those we encountered in the people who first taught us about affection, long ago in a childhood we are starting at last to understand and free ourselves from. ©️The Counsellor
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  • *A Cry for Our Children: A Wake-Up Call to Parents and a Return to Godly Parenting*

    With a heavy heart, I watched a video making rounds - the SS3 students, young minds who just concluded their WAEC exams, engaging in shameful and immoral displays in the name of celebration. What should have been a moment of reflection has been turned into a festival of indecency and mockery of values.

    This is not the generation our forefathers prayed for.

    We are raising a generation that seems to have lost its way—where vulgarity is called expression, and shame is dismissed as old-fashioned. These are not just "children having fun." These are warning signs of a decaying moral foundation.

    To every parent out there: do not assume your child knows better. Do not assume they are safe just because you provide, clothe, and send them to school. School can never ever do everything. The school can never be successful if a family foundation and culture are not already there. Cultivate moral principles at ages 1 and 12, then the school will build from there. Be close to your children. Talk to them. Know their friends. Know their struggles. Monitor their online habits. Most importantly—pray for them, and pray with them.

    The truth is painful: many parents are present in the home but absent in the lives of their children.

    We must return to the way of our grandparents—a way built on discipline, respect, fear of God, and community accountability. They didn’t need the internet to teach values. They taught it at dawn prayers, at family meals, with the rod of correction wrapped in deep love and concern.

    "Spare the rod and spoil the child." This is not just a saying—it’s a divine imperative as well as principle. A generation not corrected will surely correct itself in the street, behind bars, or on a viral video for the world to scorn.

    Dear parent, wake up. You are not just raising a child. You are shaping a future husband, a future wife, a future leader. Don’t leave that to chance. The enemy is not sleeping—why should you?

    We must return to God. We must return to prayer. We must return to values, a return to character moulding. It takes time, it needs time. It is cumbersome, it is not an easy job as many modern day parents think. It is painstaking. May God have mercy on this generation. May He open our eyes before it is too late.

    *Let this video not just make us shake our heads. Let it shake us back to responsibility.*

    Rev. Fr. Francis UNEGBU (PhD)
    Noble Mentor
    *A Cry for Our Children: A Wake-Up Call to Parents and a Return to Godly Parenting* With a heavy heart, I watched a video making rounds - the SS3 students, young minds who just concluded their WAEC exams, engaging in shameful and immoral displays in the name of celebration. What should have been a moment of reflection has been turned into a festival of indecency and mockery of values. This is not the generation our forefathers prayed for. We are raising a generation that seems to have lost its way—where vulgarity is called expression, and shame is dismissed as old-fashioned. These are not just "children having fun." These are warning signs of a decaying moral foundation. To every parent out there: do not assume your child knows better. Do not assume they are safe just because you provide, clothe, and send them to school. School can never ever do everything. The school can never be successful if a family foundation and culture are not already there. Cultivate moral principles at ages 1 and 12, then the school will build from there. Be close to your children. Talk to them. Know their friends. Know their struggles. Monitor their online habits. Most importantly—pray for them, and pray with them. The truth is painful: many parents are present in the home but absent in the lives of their children. We must return to the way of our grandparents—a way built on discipline, respect, fear of God, and community accountability. They didn’t need the internet to teach values. They taught it at dawn prayers, at family meals, with the rod of correction wrapped in deep love and concern. "Spare the rod and spoil the child." This is not just a saying—it’s a divine imperative as well as principle. A generation not corrected will surely correct itself in the street, behind bars, or on a viral video for the world to scorn. Dear parent, wake up. You are not just raising a child. You are shaping a future husband, a future wife, a future leader. Don’t leave that to chance. The enemy is not sleeping—why should you? We must return to God. We must return to prayer. We must return to values, a return to character moulding. It takes time, it needs time. It is cumbersome, it is not an easy job as many modern day parents think. It is painstaking. May God have mercy on this generation. May He open our eyes before it is too late. *Let this video not just make us shake our heads. Let it shake us back to responsibility.* Rev. Fr. Francis UNEGBU (PhD) Noble Mentor
    0 Kommentare 1 Geteilt 92 Ansichten
  • Lionel Messi is the only player with 865 goals, 384 assists, and a World Cup to his name!

    GOAT!
    🇦🇷 Lionel Messi is the only player with 865 goals, 384 assists, and a World Cup to his name! GOAT! 🐐
    0 Kommentare 0 Geteilt 42 Ansichten
  • Aaron Anselmino is among those expected to be in the Chelsea squad for the Club World Cup.

    Chelsea players have now been fully informed of their selection status ahead of the Club World Cup squad announcement.

    Nizaar Kinsella - BBC Sport

    #CFC | #Chelsea

    @CFC_ChelseaFC
    Aaron Anselmino is among those expected to be in the Chelsea squad for the Club World Cup. Chelsea players have now been fully informed of their selection status ahead of the Club World Cup squad announcement. 🔗 Nizaar Kinsella - BBC Sport #CFC | #Chelsea 📲 @CFC_ChelseaFC
    0 Kommentare 2 Geteilt 176 Ansichten
  • FC Barcelona and the first team player Clément Lenglet have reached an agreement for the termination of the contract linking the two parties.

    El FC Barcelona i el jugador del primer equip Clément Lenglet han arribat a un acord per a la rescissió del seu contracte amb el Club.

    El FC Barcelona y el jugador del primer equipo Clément Lenglet han llegado a un acuerdo para la rescisión de su contrato con el Club.
    FC Barcelona and the first team player Clément Lenglet have reached an agreement for the termination of the contract linking the two parties. El FC Barcelona i el jugador del primer equip Clément Lenglet han arribat a un acord per a la rescissió del seu contracte amb el Club. El FC Barcelona y el jugador del primer equipo Clément Lenglet han llegado a un acuerdo para la rescisión de su contrato con el Club.
    Love
    1
    0 Kommentare 3 Geteilt 195 Ansichten
  • "I will choose Cristiano Ronaldo over Messi anyday, anytime. He's a discipline hardworking best footballer of all time "__ Davido

    "I'm a fan of Arsenal. I like man utd ,I love Man City and Real Madrid. I choose Saka as my best Young Player ever.
    Cristiano Ronaldo is my Best footballer. Man is very Disciplined, strong,a leader,and he's courageous. To have that kind of success and being disciplined at thesame time is something I have always admire about him. I like Ronaldo and Messi,but personally I'm a Ronaldo Fan for Real. So Cristiano Ronaldo anytime, anywhere.

    ___ Davido
    "I will choose Cristiano Ronaldo over Messi anyday, anytime. He's a discipline hardworking best footballer of all time "__ Davido "I'm a fan of Arsenal. I like man utd ,I love Man City and Real Madrid. I choose Saka as my best Young Player ever. Cristiano Ronaldo is my Best footballer. Man is very Disciplined, strong,a leader,and he's courageous. To have that kind of success and being disciplined at thesame time is something I have always admire about him. I like Ronaldo and Messi,but personally I'm a Ronaldo Fan for Real. So Cristiano Ronaldo anytime, anywhere. ___ Davido
    0 Kommentare 4 Geteilt 233 Ansichten
  • BREAKING: Kevin De Bruyne to Napoli, here we go! Final green light arrives from Belgian star to join Italian champions.
    Two year deal + option agreed, medical and formal steps to follow for KDB to become Napoli player.
    Massive signing for Napoli, planning for more to come.
    🚨💣 BREAKING: Kevin De Bruyne to Napoli, here we go! Final green light arrives from Belgian star to join Italian champions. Two year deal + option agreed, medical and formal steps to follow for KDB to become Napoli player. Massive signing for Napoli, planning for more to come.
    Like
    1
    0 Kommentare 0 Geteilt 84 Ansichten
  • https://www.news18.com/movies/bollywood/tiger-shroff-trolled-for-playing-cricket-in-only-underwear-iske-paas-kapde-nahi-hain-ws-l-9378993.html?utm_medium=social&utm_source=whatsapp&utm_campaign=regular-editorial
    https://www.news18.com/movies/bollywood/tiger-shroff-trolled-for-playing-cricket-in-only-underwear-iske-paas-kapde-nahi-hain-ws-l-9378993.html?utm_medium=social&utm_source=whatsapp&utm_campaign=regular-editorial
    WWW.NEWS18.COM
    Tiger Shroff TROLLED For Playing Cricket In Only Underwear: 'Iske Paas Kapde Nahi Hain?'
    Tiger Shroff was the only scantily clad person in the video, and this led to a barrage of reactions on social media.
    0 Kommentare 0 Geteilt 57 Ansichten
  • *SOME NIGERIAN NEWSPAPER HEADLINES+, 11/06/2025*

    Tinubu returns to Abuja, inaugurates rehabilitated ICC

    Deadly flood: Niger communities battle stench from decaying corpses

    Mokwa flood: Borno, Taraba donate N350m to victims

    NiMet workers finally receive minimum wage

    NSCDC debunks fake recruitment on social media

    Naira appreciates to N1,600/$ in parallel market

    Trump unveils $1,000 investment accounts for newborn Americans

    US to restore some medical research grants, says Trump official

    17 Palestinians killed in Israeli strikes near Gaza aid site

    Seven dead, schoolchildren missing as storm hits South Africa

    World Bank projects three-year steady economic growth for Nigeria

    Saudi’s Aramco delays Nigeria’s crude-backed $5bn loan

    Lagos court jails nine Chinese for cybercrimes

    19-year-old Nigerian artiste beaten to death in Ghana


    ---------------------------
    *DID YOU KNOW?*

    * Octopuses have three hearts and blue blood. Two hearts pump blood to the gills while one pumps oxygenated blood to the rest of the body. Their blood is blue because it uses copper to transport oxygen unlike the red blood of humans which is transported with iron.

    * Joal-Fadiouth, a district in Senegal, has an island and a beach entirely made of seashells.
    ---------------------------

    Tinubu mandates MDAs to pay for Abuja conference centre

    National Assembly mulls extension of 2024 budget capital vote

    Senate pushes to move presidential inauguration venue from Eagle Square to N’Assembly

    Petroleum subsidy was a scam, Nigeria can’t go back – Orji Kalu

    Alleged N5.2b fraud: Court rejects ex-JAMB Registrar’s no-case submission

    Court to hear suit on proposed sale of Lafarge

    Court jails Afriq System’s CEO, Michael, over alleged $854.4m, N590m fraud

    Indian, Dangote workers arraigned for diverting N4bn diesel

    Court jails three for vandalising IKEDC cables

    Woman jailed three years for child abuse in Ekiti

    Family, lawyer urge EFCC to release CBEX promoter

    Army kills terrorist kingpin, Jidda, others in Yobe, Borno

    NAF probes death of detained corporal

    Army celebrates troops battling insecurity in S’East

    Divestment key to oil sector growth- Lokpobiri

    FG to train 100,000 youths annually in forex trading

    FG budget cut leaves 1,500 health workers without pay

    FG eyes private capital for infrastructure at PPP summit

    SEC directs firms to honour unclaimed dividends

    Maritime bank to upgrade major shipyards – CEO

    Wike Renames International Conference Centre After Tinubu

    UNIJOS ready to host 2025 NUGA Games, says VC

    Gregory varsity inducts 83 medical doctors

    Ugosimba chieftaincy title for First Lady Tinubu in Enugu

    90% of Yoruba kings don’t believe in Yoruba gods — Seun Kuti

    My business collapsed after public criticism of pastors – Daddy Freeze

    No prayers can erase six million Igbo deaths, group tells Gowon

    Youths kick as gunmen kill 58, burn 82 houses in Plateau

    June 12: Ijaw youths ask Tinubu to restore democracy in Rivers

    Tinubu has failed to improve governance after Buhari’s era – Baba-Ahmed

    Diesel, petrol to cost more as four depot owners raise prices

    TAJBank signs agreement for N20bn Mudarabah Sukuk bond issuance

    Accion MfB opens new branch in Ilorin

    Local telecom operators spend $350m annually on diesel – Report

    Edo Line retruns 15 years after

    10 startups emerge winners of JusticeTechNG

    i-Fitness boosts expansion plan

    Reconcile or face impeachment, Rivers APC warns Fubara

    Obi, Otti responsible for our crisis, not Fed Govt, says LP

    We will police our votes in 2027, Obi vows

    Saraki, PDP reconciliation committee meet Makinde

    Power play: PDP convention caught in Wike-Makinde camps crossfire

    Ajayi, PDP set to appeal tribunal’s verdict affirming Aiyedatiwa

    Makinde, Speaker mourn Adefope

    Adeleke commiserates with Oke-IIa monarch over wife’s death

    Sanwo-Olu urges parents to instill values in children

    Ododo warns against politicising insecurities

    Mokwa flood: We don’t know where waters are coming from – Niger gov

    Residents seek intervention as erosion sacks nine Anambra villages

    Low turnout in Kano as civil servants resume

    Many escape death as petrol-laden tanker explodes in Oyo

    Pastor Adeboye visits Alaafin of Oyo

    Ondo traders get N43m, 150 solar lights to boost business

    1 Killed, 3 Abducted As Gunmen Invade Cashew Warehouse In Kwara

    Two Truck Drivers Gunned Down, Vehicles Set Ablaze In Imo


    ---------------------------

    *TODAY IN HISTORY*

    * On this day in 1994, Chief Moshood Kashimawo Olawale (MKO) Abiola declared himself as Nigeria’s president in what is now known as the Epetedo Declaration. This was a year after the June 12, 1993, which it is now cofirmed he won, was annulled by the military regime of General Ibrahim Babangida. Less than 24 hours, he was arrested by the military government led by General Sani Abacha and detained without trial. He remained in custody till July 7, 1998 when he died under suspicious circumstances, just days after Abacha died.

    ---------------------------

    Put all excuses aside and remember this: YOU are capable. – Zig Ziglar

    *Compiled by Hon. Osuji George osujis@yahoo
    *SOME NIGERIAN NEWSPAPER HEADLINES+, 11/06/2025* Tinubu returns to Abuja, inaugurates rehabilitated ICC Deadly flood: Niger communities battle stench from decaying corpses Mokwa flood: Borno, Taraba donate N350m to victims NiMet workers finally receive minimum wage NSCDC debunks fake recruitment on social media Naira appreciates to N1,600/$ in parallel market Trump unveils $1,000 investment accounts for newborn Americans US to restore some medical research grants, says Trump official 17 Palestinians killed in Israeli strikes near Gaza aid site Seven dead, schoolchildren missing as storm hits South Africa World Bank projects three-year steady economic growth for Nigeria Saudi’s Aramco delays Nigeria’s crude-backed $5bn loan Lagos court jails nine Chinese for cybercrimes 19-year-old Nigerian artiste beaten to death in Ghana --------------------------- *DID YOU KNOW?* * Octopuses have three hearts and blue blood. Two hearts pump blood to the gills while one pumps oxygenated blood to the rest of the body. Their blood is blue because it uses copper to transport oxygen unlike the red blood of humans which is transported with iron. * Joal-Fadiouth, a district in Senegal, has an island and a beach entirely made of seashells. --------------------------- Tinubu mandates MDAs to pay for Abuja conference centre National Assembly mulls extension of 2024 budget capital vote Senate pushes to move presidential inauguration venue from Eagle Square to N’Assembly Petroleum subsidy was a scam, Nigeria can’t go back – Orji Kalu Alleged N5.2b fraud: Court rejects ex-JAMB Registrar’s no-case submission Court to hear suit on proposed sale of Lafarge Court jails Afriq System’s CEO, Michael, over alleged $854.4m, N590m fraud Indian, Dangote workers arraigned for diverting N4bn diesel Court jails three for vandalising IKEDC cables Woman jailed three years for child abuse in Ekiti Family, lawyer urge EFCC to release CBEX promoter Army kills terrorist kingpin, Jidda, others in Yobe, Borno NAF probes death of detained corporal Army celebrates troops battling insecurity in S’East Divestment key to oil sector growth- Lokpobiri FG to train 100,000 youths annually in forex trading FG budget cut leaves 1,500 health workers without pay FG eyes private capital for infrastructure at PPP summit SEC directs firms to honour unclaimed dividends Maritime bank to upgrade major shipyards – CEO Wike Renames International Conference Centre After Tinubu UNIJOS ready to host 2025 NUGA Games, says VC Gregory varsity inducts 83 medical doctors Ugosimba chieftaincy title for First Lady Tinubu in Enugu 90% of Yoruba kings don’t believe in Yoruba gods — Seun Kuti My business collapsed after public criticism of pastors – Daddy Freeze No prayers can erase six million Igbo deaths, group tells Gowon Youths kick as gunmen kill 58, burn 82 houses in Plateau June 12: Ijaw youths ask Tinubu to restore democracy in Rivers Tinubu has failed to improve governance after Buhari’s era – Baba-Ahmed Diesel, petrol to cost more as four depot owners raise prices TAJBank signs agreement for N20bn Mudarabah Sukuk bond issuance Accion MfB opens new branch in Ilorin Local telecom operators spend $350m annually on diesel – Report Edo Line retruns 15 years after 10 startups emerge winners of JusticeTechNG i-Fitness boosts expansion plan Reconcile or face impeachment, Rivers APC warns Fubara Obi, Otti responsible for our crisis, not Fed Govt, says LP We will police our votes in 2027, Obi vows Saraki, PDP reconciliation committee meet Makinde Power play: PDP convention caught in Wike-Makinde camps crossfire Ajayi, PDP set to appeal tribunal’s verdict affirming Aiyedatiwa Makinde, Speaker mourn Adefope Adeleke commiserates with Oke-IIa monarch over wife’s death Sanwo-Olu urges parents to instill values in children Ododo warns against politicising insecurities Mokwa flood: We don’t know where waters are coming from – Niger gov Residents seek intervention as erosion sacks nine Anambra villages Low turnout in Kano as civil servants resume Many escape death as petrol-laden tanker explodes in Oyo Pastor Adeboye visits Alaafin of Oyo Ondo traders get N43m, 150 solar lights to boost business 1 Killed, 3 Abducted As Gunmen Invade Cashew Warehouse In Kwara Two Truck Drivers Gunned Down, Vehicles Set Ablaze In Imo --------------------------- *TODAY IN HISTORY* * On this day in 1994, Chief Moshood Kashimawo Olawale (MKO) Abiola declared himself as Nigeria’s president in what is now known as the Epetedo Declaration. This was a year after the June 12, 1993, which it is now cofirmed he won, was annulled by the military regime of General Ibrahim Babangida. Less than 24 hours, he was arrested by the military government led by General Sani Abacha and detained without trial. He remained in custody till July 7, 1998 when he died under suspicious circumstances, just days after Abacha died. --------------------------- Put all excuses aside and remember this: YOU are capable. – Zig Ziglar *Compiled by Hon. Osuji George osujis@yahoo
    0 Kommentare 1 Geteilt 97 Ansichten
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