*Dear parents and upcoming ones,,,*

*What are the other alternatives for yelling?*

Children who have a positive relationship and healthy communication with their parents often adopt good behavior and want to make their parents happy.

while

Yelling at a child is not the best way to correct bad behavior.

Here are some other parenting strategies that may help:

-- *Leave the conflict zone.*

Stepping or walking away from the room for a few seconds can give you time to calm down, reassess the situation, and think about what can be done instead of yelling.

-- *Recognize the triggers.*

Yelling doesn’t happen out of the blue. It is usually a response to a specific behavior or stress. Self-awareness can help you make better choices and avoid yelling.

-- *Encourage your child to express their emotions* .
When your child does something wrong, try talking to them about their emotions and encourage them to share how they’re feeling. Doing this can help your child develop a respectful attitude and understand how you feel about their bad behavior.

-- *Address bad behavior calmly but firmly.*

When your child misbehaves, avoid saying hurtful things that could demoralize them. Maintaining eye contact with your child when talking to them about acceptable and unacceptable behaviors creates a strong communication bond.

-- *Implement consequences and leave out the threats.*

Children feel threatened when their parents yell or punish them.
Instead of yelling when your child misbehaves, implement consequences for their actions.
The consequences don’t have to be severe. They can be something simple, such as taking away toys, giving them a time-out, or reducing screen time.

Always remember, whatever you do to a child he or she does not forget, will either impact them positively or negatively, and their tomorrow maybe affected too as well as their parenthood time.

May God give you knowledge and guidance during your time and moments with thy family 🙏🏻

One late night, while browsing through the Lulu bookstore in search of self-help books, I stumbled upon How to Outsmart a Manipulator by Justin Taylor. The title immediately caught my attention, resonating with my recent experiences. I had been grappling with the realization that a close friend had been subtly manipulating me. Their constant need for control, the guilt-tripping, and the way they twisted situations to their advantage had left me feeling confused and emotionally drained. I hadn't recognized these behaviors as manipulation until I saw this book. Hoping to find clarity and regain control over my interactions, I purchased it.

Reading Taylor's book was an eye-opening experience. It not only helped me identify the manipulative tactics used against me but also provided practical strategies to counteract them. Here are ten invaluable lessons I learned:

1. Recognize Manipulative Behavior Early

Taylor emphasizes the importance of identifying manipulation before it takes hold. He outlines common tactics such as guilt-tripping, gaslighting, and playing the victim. Understanding these signs enabled me to spot manipulation in its early stages and address it promptly.

2. Understand the Psychology Behind Manipulation

The book delves into the psychological mechanisms manipulators exploit, such as our desire for approval or fear of conflict. By understanding these, I became more aware of my vulnerabilities and learned to protect myself from being exploited.

3. Set Clear Boundaries

Taylor stresses the necessity of establishing and maintaining personal boundaries. He provides guidance on how to communicate limits assertively and the importance of consistency in upholding them. Implementing this advice helped me reclaim my personal space and autonomy.

4. Build Emotional Resilience

Manipulators often target emotional weaknesses. The book offers exercises to strengthen emotional resilience, such as mindfulness practices and self-reflection techniques. These tools have been instrumental in helping me stay grounded and less susceptible to emotional manipulation.

5. Trust Your Instincts

Taylor encourages readers to listen to their gut feelings. Often, we sense something is off but dismiss it. Learning to trust my instincts has been crucial in identifying and avoiding manipulative situations.

6. Communicate Assertively

The book provides strategies for assertive communication, emphasizing the use of "I" statements and maintaining a calm demeanor. This approach has empowered me to express my needs and concerns without aggression or passivity.

7. Avoid Justifying or Over-Explaining

Manipulators often exploit our tendency to over-explain. Taylor advises keeping explanations concise and avoiding unnecessary justifications. This tactic has helped me maintain control during interactions and prevent being drawn into manipulative dialogues.

8. Recognize the Impact of Manipulation on Mental Health

The book discusses how prolonged exposure to manipulation can lead to anxiety, depression, and low self-esteem. Acknowledging this impact motivated me to prioritize my mental well-being and seek supportive relationships.

9. Develop a Support System

Taylor highlights the importance of surrounding oneself with trustworthy individuals. Building a support network has provided me with perspective, encouragement, and a safe space to discuss concerns.

10. Empower Yourself Through Knowledge

Ultimately, the book underscores that knowledge is power. Understanding manipulation tactics and how to counter them has restored my confidence and sense of control. I now approach relationships with a balanced perspective, aware of potential red flags and equipped to handle them.

How to Outsmart a Manipulator by Justin Taylor has been a transformative read. It has not only helped me navigate and exit a toxic friendship but also equipped me with the tools to foster healthier relationships moving forward. I feel more confident, self-assured, and prepared to protect my emotional well-being.

BOOK LINK: https://www.lulu.com/shop/justin-taylor/how-to-outsmart-a-manipulator/ebook/product-jewnzz5.html?q=How+to+Outsmart+a+Manipulator+&page=1&pageSize=4

The devastating impact of loneliness in young children.

Loneliness is a silent struggle that often goes unnoticed, even when kids seemingly have everything they need – a roof over their heads, food on the table, nice clothes, and material comforts. But the truth is, these external things are not enough.

As parents, we may get caught up in the busyness of life, juggling work, responsibilities, and commitments.

....And often we may unintentionally overlook the profound importance of our presence in our children's lives.

We might assume that material provisions are sufficient, but they are not. Our children need more than just physical necessities – they need our love, attention, and emotional support.

Loneliness can be especially devastating for young minds. When kids feel disconnected, isolated, and unheard, it can have long-lasting effects on their mental and emotional well-being. It's heartbreaking to think that children, who should be experiencing the joy and wonder of childhood, are instead battling feelings of emptiness and despair.

.....We need to recognize the significance of building open lines of communication with our kids. We must create an environment where they feel safe, heard, and understood. It's crucial to encourage them to express their thoughts, feelings, and struggles without fear of judgment or rejection.

By fostering a culture of open communication, we can help prevent the unimaginable pain that some children endure. Suicide rates among young people are alarmingly high, and loneliness often plays a role in their struggles. We cannot underestimate the power of being present and attentive in our children's lives.

Let's prioritize quality time with our kids – not just physically being in the same space, but truly engaging with them, listening to their stories, dreams, and fears. Let's create meaningful connections, nurturing their emotional well-being and helping them navigate life's challenges.

Remember, it's not about the material possessions we provide; it's about the love and support we offer. Our children deserve our unwavering presence and the reassurance that they are never alone in this world.

Together, let's make a difference by being there for our children, building bridges of understanding, and instilling in them a sense of belonging and love. Their precious hearts and minds depend on it.

LOVE YOUR CHILDREN! ~ Lorena Acosta.

I am not a parent but I was once a child. If I can give one piece of advice to all parents is that, TIME is priceless, it is everything.

Be present and consistent with your kids, every day of their life. Yes, food, housing, clothes, school is important but it's not enough. Make sure to have a one on one with your kid every day, or at least a couple times a week. Make them feel heard, included, appreciated, safe. Be their best friend but most of all their parents to protect and guide them.

wa.me/237675407460⁩

Stella Etoh-Nombo
#parentingchallenges #counselling #support #motivation #mentalhealth #traumahealing #help #healingtrauma

*Kindness costs nothing, but it can mean everything. We’re all carrying things — worries, stress, quiet battles — that others can’t always see. And sometimes, the smallest gesture can shift someone’s entire day. A kind word. A moment of patience. A smile. You never know the impact your presence might have. So choose kindness, every chance you get. It might seem simple, but it often makes all the difference. *

*Kindness costs nothing, but it can mean everything. We’re all carrying things — worries, stress, quiet battles — that others can’t always see. And sometimes, the smallest gesture can shift someone’s entire day. A kind word. A moment of patience. A smile. You never know the impact your presence might have. So choose kindness, every chance you get. It might seem simple, but it often makes all the difference. *

Discovering your own Gift involves introspection, self-assessment, and a willingness to learn and adapt.

Here are some strategies to help you get started:

1. Set clear goals: Establish what you want to achieve in different areas of your life, such as career, relationships, or personal growth.

2. Track your progress: Keep a journal, log your accomplishments, or use a habit-tracking app to monitor your progress.

3. Reflect on your strengths and weaknesses: Identify areas where you excel and areas that need improvement.

4. Seek feedback: Ask for constructive feedback from trusted friends, family, or colleagues.

5. Practice self-awareness: Recognize your thoughts, emotions, and behaviors, and how they impact your productivity and quality of work.

6. Develop a growth mindset: Be open to learning, experimenting, and taking calculated risks.

7. Prioritize tasks: Focus on high-impact activities that align with your goals and values.

8. Eliminate distractions: Minimize procrastination and optimize your workflow.

9. Celebrate small wins: Acknowledge and celebrate your achievements, no matter how small.

10. Continuously learn and improve: Stay updated with industry trends, best practices, and new skills to enhance your quality and efficiency.

By implementing these strategies, you'll be better equipped to discover your strengths, weaknesses, and areas for improvement, ultimately enhancing your overall quality and efficiency.

What specific area of your life do you want to improve?

1. A leader leads from the front not from the back
2. A leader does first before he asks his followers to do not the other way round
3. A leader listens more than he speaks
4. A leader takes responsibility, not excuses
5. A leader corrects in private and praises in public
6. A leader stands strong during chaos, not just in comfort
7. A leader motivates by example, not by pressure
8. A leader protects the weak, not exploit them
9. A leader shows vision, not confusion
10. A leader works with the team, not above the team
11. A leader creates more leaders, not more followers
12. A leader stays calm even when others panic
13. A leader stays focused on the goal, not distracted by noise
14. A leader serves before he commands
15. A leader accepts blame and shares the credit
16. A leader builds trust, not fear
17. A leader values growth over perfection
18. A leader solves problems, not spread blame
19. A leader remains humble no matter how high he climbs
20. A leader respects others regardless of their position
21. A leader keeps learning, even while leading
22. A leader inspires with actions, not just words

23. A leader speaks truth, not what’s convenient
24. A leader admits mistakes, not cover them
25. A leader remains consistent, not double-faced
26. A leader earns loyalty, not demand it
27. A leader walks with integrity, not hidden agendas
28. A leader stays visible when it's tough, not hide
29. A leader builds bridges, not walls
30. A leader lifts others up, not tramples on them

*Encouragement Paragraph:*
True leadership is not about titles or positions — it’s about action, impact, and character. Whether you lead a team, a family, a community, or just yourself, be the kind of leader who leads by example. People follow what they see, not what they hear. So rise, lead with love, strength, and integrity. The world needs more of such leadership.

*THE RESTORER'S DAILY GUIDE*

DATE: THURSDAY 22ND MAY 2025

THEME: *UNDERSTANDING THE VISIONS OF GOD*

MEMORIZE
Proverbs 29:18
Where there is no vision, the people perish: but he that keepeth the law, happy is he.

READ
2 Chronicles 26:1-5
Then all the people of Judah took Uzziah, who was sixteen years old, and made him king in the room of his father Amaziah.
He built Eloth, and restored it to Judah, after that the king slept with his fathers.
Sixteen years old was Uzziah when he began to reign, and he reigned fifty and two years in Jerusalem. His mother's name also was Jecoliah of Jerusalem.
And he did that which was right in the sight of the LORD, according to all that his father Amaziah did.
And he sought God in the days of Zechariah, who had understanding in the visions of God: and as long as he sought the LORD, God made him to prosper.

THOUGHT FOR THE DAY
*Fellowship and deep intimacy with God is the key to understanding the visions of God.*

MESSAGE
Vision is a personal thing, because it connects with how a person thinks and sees things.
Oftentimes, when we look, we don't see what we are looking at, we rather see what is in us and we see things from who we are. So our vision is a reflection of our individual perspectives, passions and preferences.

*Every vision is rooted in the ideology of its visionary.*

So when we talk about understanding the vision of God, we are talking about understanding God's psychology, phylosophy and preferences and passions.
It is what God loves and prefers to see that matters to Him and that is what He focusses on. To therefore understand God's ways, we need to know what is on God's mind, what are His preferences, what is His purpose and passion.

All of these are the yardsticks for ascertaining, understanding and facilitating the visions of God.

It was because, Uzziah served under a man who understood the way God thinks and operates that made him to prosper in seeking the God of Israel.

We must pay attention to the mind, will and purposes of God to be able to raise up a generation of God seekers on earth in our time.

This entails deep and steady walk with God. We can only tell where God is moving next if we have been with Him. *Fellowship and deep intimacy with God is the key to understanding the visions of God.*

Our timeless guide into the mind and ways of God is His revealed Word to us; this makes regular reading of God's word an absolute necessity to all who seek to truly know and walk with the LORD.

And when we have an understanding of the visions of God, we will be empowered to raise up a generation of deep seekers of God.

ACTION STEPS
1. Cultivate and maintain a habit of regular fellowship with the Lord in the word and prayers.
2. Seek to always get it right with God.
3. Be passionate about raising a generation of God seekers by focusing on winning one soul at a time.

PRAYERS
Dear heavenly Father, thank you for today's devotional guide, I receive grace to impact my generation with your counsel and purposes and to stay on course with you till the end in Jesus name. Amen.

REMEMBER
*Fellowship and deep intimacy with God is the key to understanding the visions of God.*

AUTHOR: JEDIDIAH DAVID

DAILY READINGS: Joshua 18; Psalms 23; Proverbs 14; Matthew 15; Acts 15;

HYMN
When we walk with the Lord
In the light of His Word,
What a glory He sheds on our way !
While we do His good will.
He abides with us still,
And with all who will trust and obey.

Trust and obey, for there's no other way
To be happy in Jesus but to trust and obey.

2
Not a shadow can rise
Not a cloud in the skies,
But His smile quickly drives it away ;
Not a doubt nor a fear,
Not a sigh nor a tear,
Can abide while we trust and obey.

3
Not a burden we bear,
Not a sorrow we share,
But our toil He doth richly repay ;
Not a grief nor a loss,
Not a frown nor a cross,
But is blest if we trust and obey.

4
But we never can prove
The delights of His love,
Until all on the altar we lay ;
For the favour He shows,
And the joy He bestows,
Are for them who will trust and obey.

5
Then in fellowship sweet
We will sit at His feet,
Or we'll walk by His side in the way ;
What He says we will do,
Where He sends we will go,
Never fear, only trust and obey.

PLEASE SHARE

Depression speaks louder than words, but HOPE speaks louder.

Join Dr. Olufunke Adetuberu Solution and a seasoned therapist for a vital dialogue:

“Can Depression Lead to Suicide? Breaking the Cycle with Therapy.”

Date: Wednesday, 21st May 2025
Time: 4 PM West African Time
Location: Instagram, TikTok, Facebook Live @funkeadetuberu

Gain insights, find hope, and take the first step toward healing.

This conversation could save a life. 🫶

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Kindness costs nothing, but it can mean everything. We’re all carrying things — worries, stress, quiet battles — that others can’t always see. And sometimes, the smallest gesture can shift someone’s entire day. A kind word. A moment of patience. A smile. You never know the impact your presence might have. So choose kindness, every chance you get. It might seem simple, but it often makes all the difference.

NEVER EVER FORGET THESE LESSONS OF LIFE

*1. Always remember that you can grow without destroying others.*

*2. Always remember that your dreams can be fulfilled without sabotaging others.*

*3. Always remember that nobody must go down for you to rise.*

*4. Always remember that nobody must be shamed or embarrassed for your smile to be sustained.*

*5. Always remember that while others are rising, you can also rise.*

*6. Always remember that finding satisfaction in the pain of others will never bring you true happiness.*

*7. Always remember that what you wish others is a prayer for yourself.*

*8. Become the good fire that genuinely lights up others, not one that ruins the joy, goodwill, and expectation of others.*

*9. Never take delight in causing pain or sponsoring the tears of another. What you sow will come back to you in multiplied folds*

*10. Never ever use your position in authority to punish others for fear that your position would be taken from you. You never know tomorrow. Life is uncertain.* *Also never use the position you occupy today to frustrate others, for you never can tell what the future holds tomorrow.*

*11. Allow the true FEAR OF GOD to guide your days, STRENGTHEN YOUR RELATIONSHIPS and SET YOUR COURSE.*

*This is the path to true peace, lasting influence and meaningful living!*

Stay blessed and take care for those you meet on your way up are the same people you will surely meet on your way down.