If You Marry for Love—You Lose. Marriage Is Not Romance. It’s a Strategic Investment.

Let’s stop deceiving ourselves.

Love is not enough.

Romance won’t sustain you.

And marriage built on feelings will collapse under pressure.

Because marriage isn’t an emotional experiment.

It’s a power move.

1. Feelings Fade—Structure Stays

You’re happy today. Great.

But what happens when money gets tight?

What happens when you lose your job?

What happens when she wakes up and says, “I’m not in love anymore”?

If your marriage was built on butterflies, expect it to collapse once the wind changes.

Love is a spark. But marriage needs fuel.

Vision. Structure. Alignment. Sacrifice. Strategy.

2. If You’re 70 and You Marry 30—Your Household Is 50

Let’s talk logic.

You’re wise. She’s fresh.

But instead of raising your stock, she drops the average.

You’re thinking legacy—she’s thinking TikTok.

You’re building wealth—she’s building “influencer reels.”

(She’s not even ready to build it into a media business.)

You’ve seen war—she’s crying because you forgot to comment on her new selfie.

And now you’re stuck in a marriage that drags you backward.

Because you married vibes—not vision.

3. Marriage Is a Merger—Not a Movie

When two become one, it’s not about hugs and kisses.

It’s about merging empires. Consolidating influence.

Combining assets. Multiplying momentum.

Even the Bible said:

“One will chase a thousand, two will chase ten thousand.”

But what if the “two” is a liability?

What if she’s chasing dopamine instead of purpose?

What if she’s more obsessed with matching pajamas than matching values?

Now, you’re running with dead weight.

Fighting alone. Providing alone. Planning alone.

And she’s somewhere saying,
“I don’t like forcing things.”

4. Modern Girls Don’t Grind—They Ghost

Let’s be real.

Many modern women want:

• Love with no labor
• Comfort with no contribution
• Leadership with no loyalty

She wants a soft life—but won’t lift a finger.

She’s jobless, but has high taste.

She’s broke, but her demands come in six figures.

She says you’re stressing her mental health—because you asked about her career goals.

Try to build with her, and she’ll say,
“This isn’t flowing naturally. I need space.”

5.Her Submission Is a “Maybe”

Her obligations are “Optional”

Today’s woman wants:

• To reply when she feels like
• To submit if the vibe is right
• To bear children only when convenient
• To pause the relationship if she’s “not in the mood”

Any hint of hardship, she’s gone.

Any serious talk, she’s “emotionally unavailable.”

Any call for accountability, she’s “being controlled.”

And if you dare lead with firmness?

She’ll tell Twitter you’re a narcissist.

6. Dysfunction Is the New Normal

Many modern girls were raised in chaos.

Divorced parents. Absent fathers.

Traumatized mothers.

And instead of healing, they brought that chaos into dating.

So when you show up with purpose and structure?

She calls it “too much.”

She wants a soft man who’s strong.

A rich man who’s humble.

A loyal man who doesn’t ask questions.

She wants everything—but gives almost nothing.

So Here’s the Brutal Truth:

Marriage is a system.

If you don’t build it with strategy, it will collapse in drama.

Stop marrying for butterflies.

Start marrying for alignment.

For values. For vision.

Pick a partner who multiplies your purpose—not one who multiplies your pain.

Because at the end of the day…

It’s not who makes your heart skip.

It’s who helps you finish the race.

Marry wisely.

Remember—when it finally comes to a divorce, obligations are enforceable by law, but no one can compel her to keep loving you and riding your joystick that’s insisting she’s the best rider it has ever seen.

Speak with wisdom in the comments, I will like to have your opinions.

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50 HABITS OF SOUND CRITICAL THINKERS

1. ASK QUESTIONS

Critical thinkers are naturally curious. They ask why, what, how, when, and who to dig deeper into issues.

2. CLARIFY DEFINITIONS

They seek to understand and define terms clearly to avoid misunderstandings or misinterpretations.

3. GATHER RELEVANT INFORMATION

They ensure they have sufficient and accurate data before forming conclusions.

4. EXAMINE ASSUMPTIONS

They constantly test and question the assumptions behind arguments or decisions.

5. EVALUATE EVIDENCE

They assess the quality, reliability, and relevance of evidence before accepting any claim.

6. DISTINGUISH FACT FROM OPINION

They differentiate between objective facts and subjective opinions to maintain clarity.

7. CONSIDER MULTIPLE VIEWPOINTS

They listen to other perspectives before forming a judgment or decision.

8. THINK INDEPENDENTLY

They resist peer pressure and groupthink, choosing to think for themselves.

9. RECOGNIZE BIASES

They identify both personal and external biases that may affect decisions.

10. BE OPEN-MINDED

They remain receptive to new ideas, even if those ideas challenge their beliefs.

11. STAY OBJECTIVE

They try to set aside emotions when evaluating information.

12. USE LOGIC AND REASONING

They apply rules of logic to identify sound arguments and spot fallacies.

13. LOOK FOR CAUSE AND EFFECT

They analyze relationships between variables and seek out causes, not just symptoms.

14. DETECT FALLACIES

They can spot errors in reasoning, such as strawman, slippery slope, or ad hominem arguments.

15. SEEK CLARITY

They avoid vagueness and strive for precision in communication.

16. SUSPEND JUDGMENT

They avoid rushing to conclusions without sufficient evidence.

17. DRAW CONCLUSIONS CAUTIOUSLY

They avoid overgeneralization and prefer modest conclusions based on data.

18. BE CONSISTENT

They ensure that their arguments align with their principles and previous positions.

19. EMBRACE COMPLEXITY

They are not afraid of complicated problems and understand that most issues are multifaceted.

20. REFLECT REGULARLY

They evaluate their own thinking process and learn from past decisions.

21. CONSIDER LONG-TERM CONSEQUENCES

They think beyond the immediate impact and consider future effects of decisions.

22. VERIFY SOURCES

They ensure their sources are credible and not just appealing or popular.

23. CONNECT IDEAS

They make connections between different ideas, disciplines, or experiences.

24. THINK STRATEGICALLY

They consider the best paths to reach goals and how actions align with those goals.

25. SOLVE PROBLEMS METHODICALLY

They follow a step-by-step approach in analyzing and resolving problems.

26. COMMUNICATE CLEARLY

They express their thoughts logically and understandably.

27. ADAPT TO NEW INFORMATION

They change their position when evidence requires it.

28. STAY INFORMED

They continuously seek knowledge and updates in their fields of interest.

29. ENGAGE IN DEEP READING

They analyze complex texts for nuanced understanding rather than skimming.

30. RECOGNIZE EMOTIONAL INFLUENCES

They identify how feelings might cloud objective judgment.

31. SEEK FEEDBACK

They are willing to listen to constructive criticism to improve their thinking.

32. PRIORITIZE ISSUES

They focus their efforts on the most critical problems instead of minor distractions.

33. THINK AHEAD

They anticipate outcomes and consider alternatives.

34. SET THINKING GOALS

They define what they want to achieve with their analysis or decision-making.

35. DOCUMENT REASONING

They often write down their thought processes to examine them more clearly.

36. MAINTAIN INTELLECTUAL HUMILITY

They acknowledge the limits of their knowledge.

37. PRACTICE SELF-DISCIPLINE

They avoid mental laziness and the temptation to jump to easy answers.

38. ENGAGE IN DISCUSSION

They enjoy meaningful dialogues that challenge their thinking.

39. REVIEW MISTAKES

They go back to analyze poor decisions to understand what went wrong.

40. DEVELOP MENTAL MODELS

They use frameworks or analogies to better understand abstract concepts.

41. USE THOUGHT EXPERIMENTS

They imagine scenarios to explore consequences and test ideas.

42. BALANCE INTUITION AND ANALYSIS

They recognize intuition’s role but validate it with reasoning.

43. FOCUS ON PURPOSE

They keep their main goal or objective in sight during their thinking process.

44. STAY PATIENT

They don’t rush through problems; they give time to think things through.

45. RECOGNIZE CONTEXT

They consider how circumstances influence the meaning and relevance of information.

46. MAINTAIN ETHICAL AWARENESS

They incorporate values and ethics into decision-making.

47. AVOID ECHO CHAMBERS

They expose themselves to different perspectives, not just ones they agree with.

48. DEVELOP METACOGNITION

They think about how they think and improve their thinking methods.

49. PRACTICE CONSISTENTLY

They sharpen their critical thinking daily through habit, not occasional effort.

50. ACT ON YOUR THINKING

They don’t just analyze—they also make reasoned decisions and take action.

Feeling good today

I will never forgive 2go, why should I? How? Not after what 2go did to me.

I was 19 years old then, using 2go like others. I had connected with one Presh452. Peeping through my Nokia 2626, I could see a beautiful DP. Yes, I like fine fine ihe rị mma. Who no like better thing? Ị na-alụ nwaanyị jọrọ njọ a ga-ebere gị ya ego?

The connection began from chatting to exchange of phone number. Then, night calls. Then, midnight by 12:00 AM to 5:00AM you'd call and speak with anyone free of charge. When that country was still called Nigeria before it turned to Bongo.

Awwww. Midnight, innocent calls — innocent conversation — innocent "I love you...I love you too" raining like a heavy downpour in Mbanefo Hostel. Boys were calling their sweethearts, feeling loved and to be loved. Then I would be in the reading room, Presh452 would call. She's no longer Presh452 but Precious.

When the call enters, I'd leave my books to speak with Pre Pre. Awww. Love Nwantịntị. Precious is a beautiful girl. Queen of Persia. Bianca is learning beauty from her. Precious is as beautiful as the Arab Queens. In fact, through 2go, she sent me beautiful pictures.

"This is you?"

She'd say yes.

Awwww. Her beauty has turned into a butterfly, flying inside my stomach, getting out through my oesophagus, connecting to my alimentary canal. Oh, canal man cannot understand the things of the spirit.

"I can't wait to see you in Aba," my sweet Precious would say.

"I can't wait to see you too," a lost Ọnụkwube would reply.

Midnight calls back to back. Precious had told me number of children she wanted. She was going for 6, I needed just 2. In fact, if possible, 1. But 2 is okay. She didn't want 2 children, after all her father was so rich and had properties in Aba with a fleet of car. In fact, her elder brother was in Europe where he was a billionaire in Euros. So, money no be problem. "Let's have 6 children, my family are rich."

Everything was on her head. I wasn't thinking of any children. She was already planning 6 kids. With who? But you know, when the butterfy flaps its wings in your stomach, you seem to forget some yarning of dust, and dwell on the flow. The flow was flowing.

However, I had gone to the University of Port Harcourt to meet with Professor Nọlue Emenanjọ. Even though I was quite young, I had started meeting professors earlier — traveling to different universities just to meet those men I had read from books. I connected with them on personal level.

The idea was, after going to Uniport, I would branch in Aba to meet my first lady. The most beautiful woman on earth, 2go gave me. We had planned going to cinema together, eat at expensive restaurant, discuss about the future and our love life. So sweet!

She would send me more pictures.

"Are these your pictures?"

"Yes."

Chai. The girl had a pot of beauty broken on her head, and beauty drenched her body, wet it like a fowl beaten by rain. Why can't Precious compete as Miss Universe?

I had left Port Harcourt on Thursday morning. I first left Chọba for Rumuola by Aba Road. Then, Obigbo was still manageable. I plied the road by jumping on ndị Aka n'elu motor. Through Port Harcourt Road, we got to Aba.

She asked me to wait for her at Tonimas. Even though I had to meet her, I was a confirm guy man to stay at the opposite direction and observe my environment unto security-wise.

I stayed behind a parked bus to place a call, someone picked, and was approaching me.

"I am here."

"No. You are not here. I am not seeing you."

"Look at me, I am here."

Mbanụnụ.

Something was standing before me quite alright, but the thing was not a human being. Not my Precious whom I had spent my sleepless nights calling on nightcall. It cannot be my princess, my asampetecious asampete whose beauty was mesmerizing Ọbama then.

I don't want to abuse what God has created. But it seems that after God was done creating some people, they recreated themselves against God's image. Because, how can someone's eyes be bigger than ikwiikwii? Her eyes socketed inside like that of a mọnkey. Imi pịahụ ya ka imi enwe. The sponge okpu n'isi was like that of a mad woman in Eke Imeọha. Her teeth stood erect like amụ ịnyịnya.

Ọnụkwube ntọọọ. Ị chụgburu onwe gị na nwaanyị. Why do bad things keep happening to good people? My mates were using 2go and connecting with ụmụnwa, why did my own 2go connect with kpalakwukwu? Other people's snares hunted living things, mine caught non-living things.

I took a deep breath. Then asked like a conquered wrestler, "are you Precious?"

She said yes, without remorse. She wasn't even remorseful that she sold me adaka in place of enwe. I was praying, kabbashing so that people who knew me wouldn't see me with this kind of usungu. The kind akpoola she wore was sounding on the ground "ma i kelere m, ma i keleghị m, I don't care."

I had made a promise, I must fullfil it. I had promised we would go on date at Crunches located then at Ikot Ekpene Road. But, how would I be looking at this person's face? Impossible. I am not hungry. Even if I am, I'll not eat. You cannot ponzi me and expect me to be happy. Elu na ala ekwela ngwere gbaa ajị.

As we were walking, she was doing the talking, and replying herself. Me Wey be vibe turned deaf. Ogbi. She was ranting how rich her father was. How rich her brother was. Shouting as if I was Buubu who had ear problems and Ee Pee See spend billions to treat it.

Keke was coming with speed, this girl was walking like her father owned the road. The Keke almost hit her, I quickly held her backward before ikuku kẹkẹ eburu ya. I practically saved her from being crushed by the Keke.

Guess what she did?

She went to fight the Keke man. Hitting her open palm on her mouth. "Wuuuuuuuuuuu. If you try me, you will sleep in cell. I.d.i.ot, do you know who my father is?"

I was a gentleman to the core. I was pleading with the Keke man to forgive. I saw what happened. She was at fault. Everyone in the Keke was telling her she was at fault. Aunty was busy insulting them.

The Keke man wasn't responding to her but just looking at me with a pity.

"Fine boy like you, kee ihe i ji udele a eme? See the kind thing you dey Waka for road with."

Na wetin man do man.

You cannot win Aba men with bad mouth. The man was pitying me. I was trying to manage the fact that I was lied to, the same person was embarrassing herself. What was remaining was to remove her clothes and fight. So, na onye ara I came to Aba to see? 2go— tọnda faya you!

No problem. What I would do was on my mind. We got to the restaurant. I asked her to order. She placed her order. I refused to order anything. I lost appetite. What if I eat anything, someone who knows me walks in. My mama fit disown me. I cannot.

Eventually, we stepped out of the restaurant. She was telling me how her father locked her teacher for one week because the teacher punished her in school.

She was saying those things..

Guess what I did?

I took her by surprise and ran to the other side of the road, with the back of my legs touching back of my ears. Then, I jumped into Keke like a thief a na-achụ ọsọ.

"Peace Park, Peace Park!"

"Ọga na #100," the Keke man said, delaying me.

"Go! Go! I will give you 200 naira. Just go."

The Keke guy moved, the girl crossed the road, pursuing me and Keke. She had long leg oo. Chasing us oo! Thank God there was no traffic.

I got to Peace Mark, paid the Keke guy 200 naira. Big money those days. I bought my ticket and bought a newspaper I used to cover the other side — reading newspaper I didn't budget for — in case my Aba Precious abata.

The vehicle quickly filled up, we drove to Nsụka.

When I got to Nsụka, she texted me:

"Because I am not beautiful, that's why you treated me like that..."

I replied: "since you are not proud of yourself— then you were sending me other people's pictures as yours — why should I be proud of you?"

She paused, I paused, 2go paused; all of us paused!

I NOTICED SOMETHING ODD ABOUT THE BRIDE AT MY BEST FRIEND'S WEDDING, SO I LIFTED HER DRESS
I was the groom's childhood friend, and I was overjoyed to see him finally find happiness. His bride was walking down the aisle, and everything seemed like a fairytale: the stunning white dress, the long train, the flowers... But something felt off. Her walk seemed strange. It was as if she couldn't move comfortably.
I watched more closely as the bride approached the altar. Her steps were awkward, almost unsteady. Everyone around was immersed in the joyful atmosphere, but I couldn't shake the unsettling feeling that something was wrong.
As she drew nearer, one of the guests whispered a joke about how the bride seemed to be "floating" down the aisle. People chuckled softly, but I wasn't laughing. Something was eating at me. And at the very moment when the bride was nearly at the altar, I stepped closer.
My heart froze. I couldn't ignore my instincts any longer. So, just as everyone expected her to stand beside the groom, I quickly approached and gently lifted the hem of her dress.
The church fell silent, and everyone stood still. WHAT I SAW DEFIED ALL LOGIC! I looked at the groom. "What's going on?" he asked with confusion.
I didn't know how to answer him.

Losing a dog can be just as emotionally challenging as losing a human loved one.

Research has shown that the grief experienced after a pet's death mirrors that of human loss.

One study from the University of Michigan found that 85.7% of people who lost a pet experienced grief symptoms, with a significant number still feeling the impact months later.

This deep sorrow is rooted in the strong bond shared between humans and dogs. Dogs provide unconditional love, companionship, and structure in daily life, and their absence creates a void that can be hard to fill.

Psychologists explain that pet owners are not just mourning the loss of an animal but also the loss of a consistent, loving presence.

Unfortunately, society often downplays the pain of pet loss, making many owners feel their grief is less valid.

Recognizing and supporting this type of grief is essential for healing.

HABITS THAT TURN BOYS INTO MEN:

1. Responsibility:
Take responsibility for your actions & be accountable for your mistakes.

2. Respect:
Show respect for yourself & others, including those who are different from you.

3. Honesty:
Be honest in your words & actions.

4. Empathy:
Try to understand and relate to the feelings and experiences of others.

5. Self-control:
Practice selt-control and resist negative impulses.

6. Perseverance:
Keep working hard and don't give up, even when things get tough.

7. Initiative:
Take initiative and be proactive in your goals and responsibilities.

8. Time management:
Use your time wisely and efficiently.

9. Good communication:
Communicate clearly & effectively with others.

10. Problem-solving:
Use critical thinking and problem-solving skills to overcome challenges.

11. Resourcefulness:
Use your resources and skills effectively to get things done.

12. Independence:
Develop independence and self-reliance.

13. Interdependence:
Recognize the importance of teamwork and interdependence with others.

14. Creativity:
Use your creativity and imagination to come up with new ideas and Solutions.

15. Adaptability:
Be flexible & adaptable to change.

16. Leadership:
Develop leadership skills and the ability to inspire and guide others.

17. Emotional intelligence:
Develop your emotional intelligence and the ability to understand and manage your own emotions and those of others.

18. Confidence:
Believe in yourself and your abilities.

19. Courage:
Be brave and stand up for what you believe in.

20. Humility:
Be humble and open to learning and growth.

21. Gratitude:
Practice gratitude and appreciate what you have.

Great relationships don’t just happen — they’re built.

Whether you’re dating or married, a strong and sweet relationship takes time, patience, and the right principles.

Here are 5 simple reminders that’ll help you grow together and build something beautiful:

1. Pray together, grow together – Keep God at the center of your journey. If it’s not God then it’s not good.

2. Communicate with love and honesty – Communication is the blood of the union. Talk, listen and enjoy each other’s company.

3. Give, Give, Give - relationship and marriage is sweet when both parties are givers and not the other way round.

4. Respect each other’s differences – You’re a team, not twins, so don’t fight each other.

5. Invest in friendship, not just feelings – Deep friendship sustains what passion starts.

Take it one day at a time — love built right is always worth the wait.


this fine girl decided to plait tomatoes after cutting her hair to start afresh

I am Nicholas Michael Oriarewo
#relationshipcoach
#marriagecounselor
#lovebankers
#nicholasmichaeloriarewo

How To Destroy Any Bad Dream That Comes your Way. Many people unconsciously energized the bad dream sent to them and it will certainly manifest in their life how do they do that by allowing that negative dream to dwell in your mind your mind is a fertile land whatever you plant in it will germinate whether good or bad your mind is a place of creation now positivity and negativity can never work together when ever you have a negative dream please don't focus your mind unto that negative dream but rather focus your mind on the positive side of that dream for instance if you have a dream that you are sick please reverse it by making a positive affirmations saying thank God am in good health condition please believe in your affirmations so that it will work for you as far as your mind is focused on your body feeling healthy that bad dream would not manifest in your life because you did not energize it to live in your body please follow like comment and share for more information Whatsapp me on 07010643535 I will still teach you how to make your words or prayers very powerful

Divine Dose for today:


*[DO IT, AFRAID!]*
The feeling of fear is human and normal, but the refusal to act because you're afraid is the evil challenge..
*[NLT- Ezra 3:3 Even though the people were afraid of the local residents, they rebuilt the altar at its old site. Then, they began to sacrifice burnt offerings on the altar to the Lord each morning and evening.]*
Doing the needful is not often without fear, but we must choose to do it anyway. The fear of possible attack did not stop these people from
rebuilding the altar of the Lord as it ought to be built.
What is that project you're scared of venturing? Pray, be led, and do it while afraid. You'll discover it isn't as scary afteral!
Have a pleasantly restful midweek ahead.
God bless you richly.

TEN ATTITUDES OF SMART PEOPLE

1. They are usually quiet than others – Smart people often prefer to listen and observe rather than dominate conversations.

2. They are aware of their own ignorance – Smart people recognize the limits of their knowledge and are open to learning more.

3. They avoid bragging – Instead of bragging, smart people let their actions speak for themselves.

4. They are humble – Despite their intelligence, they remain modest about their abilities.

5. They may have fewer close friends – They find it difficult to connect deeply with others because of their unique perspective.

6. They ask insightful questions – Smart people question deeply, seeking to understand and analyze.

7. They identify flaws and loopholes – They often examine systems or arguments to find imperfections.

8. They enjoy reading – A love of books and continuous learning is common among intelligent people.

9. They have strong intuition – They can often sense the true intentions and feelings of others.

10. They avoid confrontation – Intelligent individuals generally avoid unnecessary arguments and conflicts.

#copied

Feeling good to night