7 THINGS THAT CAN MAKE YOU BROKE FASTER THAN VILLAGE PEOPLE

Forget jazz, forget enemies from the village—some of you are going broke at lightning speed, and it’s not because of witchcraft. Your own lifestyle is the real problem!

If you're always wondering "Who is eating my money?"—relax, Oga. The answer is you.

BRUTAL THREAD:

1. CHASING EVERY WOMAN YOU SEE

You think you're James Bond, moving from one fine girl to another, sponsoring their hair, nails, and data? Brother, you are your own Yahoo boy.

One babe says “I need urgent 2K”—you send.

Another one says “My rent is due”—you pay.

Next thing, your account balance is calling for GoFundMe.

Meanwhile, the same girls are in group chats laughing at you: “This guy dey try sha.”

Solution: Stop being an ATM with no PIN code. Focus on one woman or yourself first.

2. LIVING LIKE A BIG BOY WHEN YOUR ACCOUNT BALANCE IS SHOUTING HELP

Your salary is 50K, but you're in clubs ordering Hennessy like Davido. You don’t even have a car, but you're buying drinks for strangers—WHO SENT YOU?

Rich men are saving, you are spraying money.

Dangote is investing, you are doing “Odogwu” at the bar.

Elon Musk is buying companies, you are buying bottles for slay queens who don’t know your surname.

When the landlord comes for rent, you’ll start saying “Boss, abeg, things hard.”

Solution: Cut down on fake luxury. Even Jeff Bezos wears simple T-shirts. Be wise.

3. SENDING MONEY TO FAMILY LIKE CBN

Your uncle calls: “We need money for burial.”
Your aunt calls: “No food in the house.”
Your younger brother: “School fees.”

Now your account is empty, but when you need help? Nobody picks your call.

Oga, you are not the Minister of Finance. Even government doesn’t share free money like you do!

Solution: Learn to say NO sometimes! Help when you can, but don’t let family turn you into their personal budget.

4. ALWAYS BUYING THE LATEST PHONE TO IMPRESS WHO?

Last month, you were using iPhone 12.
This month, you saw iPhone 15 Pro Max and sold your kidney to buy it.
Next month, iPhone 16 Ultra Mega Max will drop—what will you sell next? Your destiny?

Meanwhile, the person you’re trying to impress is using Tecno Pop 5 and doesn’t care.

Solution: If your current phone is working, rest. Your future is more important than “Dynamic Island.”

5. FALLING FOR EVERY FAKE INVESTMENT SCHEME

They told you "Invest 50K, get 500K in 2 days."

You ran like Bolt, deposited your money.

Now, they’ve blocked you, and you’re writing epistles on Facebook: “Dear Nigerians, beware of fraudsters!”

Oga, they didn’t scam you, you scammed yourself!

Any investment that sounds like magic money is a Ponzi scheme in disguise.

Solution: If you don’t understand the business, don’t put your money there. Learn to invest wisely!

6. GOING BROKE JUST TO IMPRESS SOCIAL MEDIA

Your house rent is due, but you're buying designer shoes to take pictures for Instagram. Who told you “likes and comments” can pay rent?

You posted “Soft life only.”

But in real life, you’re trekking and borrowing money for food.

If your phone falls, you’ll cry because you can’t afford to fix it.

Solution: Stop forming fake rich life. Invest first, flex later.

7. BEING TOO LAZY TO MAKE MORE MONEY

You sit at home, scrolling Facebook from morning till night, complaining: “No job, Nigeria is hard.”

Meanwhile, opportunities are passing you by! Are you expecting an angel to drop money from the sky?

People are making money online—you are watching TikTok videos all day.

People are learning skills—you are arguing about football.

People are opening businesses—you are waiting for your rich uncle to die so you can inherit land.

Solution: Get up and hustle! Even the Bible says “A lazy man shall not eat.”

BOTTOM LINE:

If you're always broke, stop blaming village people. Your habits are the real witchcraft!

Live within your means.

Invest before you flex.

Stop impressing people who don’t care.

Make smart financial decisions.

If this post hit you hard, don’t cry. Just change your ways!

Follow Abasiodu Ekpenyong for more brutal truths that will save your life!

*The Joy of Bathing Together Every Night with your spouse*

Taking a bath with your spouse every night can truly transform your evenings and your relationship. It offers a unique opportunity to unwind and de-stress after a long day, letting the warm water melt away any tension you might be holding. This shared ritual creates a peaceful haven where you can talk openly and connect deeply without the usual distractions of daily life. Imagine discussing your day, sharing your thoughts, and simply being present with each other, fostering a profound sense of intimacy and closeness. It's more than just a wash; it's a dedicated moment for nurturing your bond, reinforcing that you're a team.
Beyond emotional connection, the physical act of bathing together can be incredibly therapeutic, helping both of you to relax muscles and soothe your minds. This leads to better sleep quality, as you'll both drift off feeling refreshed and content. Establishing this nightly routine adds a special, cherished element to your evenings, something you both look forward to. It's a subtle yet powerful way to inject consistent romance and tender moments into your busy lives, creating a routine that's uniquely yours. This shared experience fosters a sense of unity and shared well-being, making you feel more connected and understood. It’s about building a stronger, more loving partnership, one warm, shared bath at a time. So, why not embrace this simple yet profound way to enhance your connection and enjoy each other's company more fully? It’s a small change that can lead to big improvements in your relationship.

*One day, American auto tycoon Henry Ford 🕵🏼‍♂️made a surprising decision:* he sent all of his department heads on a two-week cruise through the Caribbean.

*No exceptions.* Even those who protested or claimed they couldn’t leave — had to go. Ford’s only command?
*“Relax, swim, soak up the sun . That’s an order.”*

*When the managers returned, some were promoted .*
*Others? Fired .*

*Why ?*

Because while they were gone, *Henry Ford 🕵🏼‍♂️* quietly observed how their departments functioned without them.

If everything ran smoothly - it meant the leader had built *a strong , self-sufficient team.*

If chaos erupted - it meant the team was too dependent on the boss. And that was a failure of leadership.

*Sometimes, the best test of a leader ... is what happens when they’re not around.*

So next time your boss offers you a cruise — be very, very prepared.

Happy Weekend, Take a deep breath, relax, and recharge. You've earned it, Make the most of these precious moments, prioritize self-care, and come back stronger on Monday.
Good evening my people

_*My wife took my phone and deleted my
girlfriend Jane's number and saved her own
number as Jane.*_

_*You see, someone has told my wife about
Jane my girl friend.*_

_*I then got an SMS from Jane asking for
mobile money 50,000.*_

_*I rushed to my wife and lied to her that I
need 50,000, for an emergency. I told her
that my mother was unwell and she needed
the money urgently.*_

_*My wife gave me the money and I rushed
to send it to my girlfriend Jane.*_

_*She did not acknowledge receipt of the
money.*_

_*When I was relaxing at home after work, I
kept wondering if Jane had received the
money.*_

_*I sent her an SMS to find out if she had
received the money. Her response was, "Call
me now".*_

_*I got out of the house to make the call.*_
_*You can imagine my horror when my
wife answered the call instead of Jane!!!!*_

_*It's been 3 hours. I'm still standing
outside.*_

_*I don't know how to come back into my
own house!*_

_*Any advice?

Note: Be faithful to your spouse. Being unfaithful is the easiest way to completely ruin your marriage. Adultery kills.

_*My wife took my phone and deleted my
girlfriend Jane's number and saved her own
number as Jane.*_

_*You see, someone has told my wife about
Jane my girl friend.*_

_*I then got an SMS from Jane asking for
mobile money 50,000.*_

_*I rushed to my wife and lied to her that I
need 50,000, for an emergency. I told her
that my mother was unwell and she needed
the money urgently.*_

_*My wife gave me the money and I rushed
to send it to my girlfriend Jane.*_

_*She did not acknowledge receipt of the
money.*_

_*When I was relaxing at home after work, I
kept wondering if Jane had received the
money.*_

_*I sent her an SMS to find out if she had
received the money. Her response was, "Call
me now".*_

_*I got out of the house to make the call.*_
_*You can imagine my horror when my
wife answered the call instead of Jane!!!!*_

_*It's been 3 hours. I'm still standing
outside.*_

_*I don't know how to come back into my
own house!*_

_*Any advice?

Note: Be faithful to your spouse. Being unfaithful is the easiest way to completely ruin your marriage. Adultery kills.

WHY AFRICANS PRAY MORE THAN THE REST OF THE WORLD IS BECAUSE IN AFRICA, GOD DOES THE JOB OF THE GOVERNMENT!

1. ELECTRICITY
AFRICA:
“Oh Lord, let there be light! Even if it’s for 2 hours!”
EUROPE:
“This LED bulb is too yellow, I’m returning it.”
TRUTH:
In Africa, power supply is a prayer point.
In Europe, it’s a basic right.

2. WATER SUPPLY
AFRICA:
“God, let it rain so we can fetch water!”
EUROPE:
“My shower is too cold. Fix it or I sue!”
TRUTH:
In Europe, taps flow.
In Africa, faith flows.

3. JOBS & EMPLOYMENT
AFRICA:
“Jehovah, bless me with any job. Even volunteer, I’ll manage!”
EUROPE:
“I’m rejecting that role. The salary doesn’t reflect my worth.”
TRUTH:
In Africa, unemployment is a fasting topic.
In Europe, it’s a policy issue.

4. SECURITY
AFRICA:
“Father, may no stray bullet locate me today!”
EUROPE:
“There’s a suspicious sound outside, police arrived in 4 mins.”
TRUTH:
There, safety is law.
Here, safety is prayer and luck.

5. ROADS & INFRASTRUCTURE
AFRICA:
“Lord, don’t let this pothole swallow my destiny.”
EUROPE:
“This small crack on the road is unacceptable!”
TRUTH:
In Africa, a smooth road is a testimony.
In Europe, it’s standard.

6. HEALTHCARE
AFRICA:
“Jesus, let the injection work, and not the side effect!”
EUROPE:
“Therapist booked. Medication free. Follow-up scheduled.”
TRUTH:
One gets healthcare from government.
The other gets hope from prayer warriors.

7. EDUCATION
AFRICA:
“God, let WAEC release results with mercy I sowed a seed !”
EUROPE:
“Government paid for my Master’s. I got a scholarship too.”
TRUTH:
There, education is an investment.
Here, it’s a miracle.

8. PENSION & RETIREMENT 👴🏽
AFRICA:
“Jehovah, don’t let my pension be swallowed by corruption!”
EUROPE:
“I retired. Government sends monthly check.”
REALITY:
Here, retirement is fear and fasting.
There, it’s relaxation and benefits.

9. VISA REQUEST
AFRICA:
“Oh Lord, break every generational curse stopping this UK visa!”
EUROPE:
“I need a break. Might fly to Ghana for the weekend.”
REALITY:
In Africa, travelling = fasting, faith, and fire oil.
In Europe, travelling = booking.com and a suitcase.

BUT HERE’S THE REAL PROBLEM…

High death rates

Joblessness

Poor security

Land battles turning spiritual

Sick people dying at church crusades instead of hospitals

…because African leaders ENJOY it when you dump your problems on an imported god instead of holding them accountable!

Why should they build hospitals when you'll run to prayer camps? By his stripes you're healed right?
Why fix the road when your busy praying for travelling mercy on a deadly road?
Why create jobs when your faith says “God will provide”?

They know you won’t protest. You’ll just pray.
And that’s how they win.

AFRICANS WILL RAISE MILLIONS TO BUILD A CATHEDRAL……but won’t donate a dime to upgrade the clinic where their own mothers give birth on rusted beds with no gloves.

We’ll buy:

Imported church instruments

HD projectors

Shiny marble altars

Designer suits for “Papa”

And bulletproof cars for “Daddy G.O”

Meanwhile, the local hospital:

Has no electricity

No running water

One nurse doing the work of five

And a doctor using a torchlight to deliver babies.

AND HERE’S THE PLOT TWIST:
The pastor you’re funding for “God’s work” won’t even treat malaria in that same country.

When he's sick?
Private jet to Europe.
When you're sick?
Pray. Fast. Sow a seed. Hope the hospital has Panadol.

FINAL THOUGHT:
God is NOT your governor.
Angels are NOT civil engineers.
Your miracle is called good governance.

Stop calling on jesus/allah about things your local government chairman should’ve done.

This is why most religious Africans tend to be less or non-religious

She Was a Virgin Maid—Until the Billionaire Took What He Wanted
Episode 2

The silence in Alhaji Malik’s room was thick like smoke when Aishah entered. The curtains were drawn, soft lights glowed from golden wall lamps, and he was seated on the edge of the massive bed, dressed in a black kaftan, sipping something from a glass that looked like wine but smelled stronger. She kept her eyes on the floor, her arms trembling as she clutched the edge of her hijab. “Come closer,” he said calmly. She didn’t move. “I said come.” His voice was not raised, but it carried a weight that pushed her forward like invisible hands. Her heart was beating like a drum, her feet cold against the tiled floor, her mind racing with every verse of protection she could remember. When she reached him, he stood and walked around her slowly like a lion circling prey. “Do you know how beautiful you are?” he asked. She didn’t answer. “I’ve had models in this house. Politicians’ daughters. But none of them made me feel like this.” His words fell like acid on her skin. She wanted to run, scream, vanish—but she stood still, trapped in fear, her hands tightly gripped together. Then he touched her. Just her chin at first. Then her waist. Then the scarf around her neck. “Don’t be afraid,” he whispered. “I won’t hurt you if you just relax.” But there was no relaxing. There was only dread. Only betrayal. Only helplessness. And when he finally took her—without violence, without shouting, but with complete control—Aishah left her own body. She stared at the ceiling. She counted the lights. She tasted the salt of her tears. She did not scream, did not fight, did not speak. When it was over, he pulled the blanket over her like it was affection, like he had done her a favour. “I’ll take care of you now,” he said, stroking her hair. “No one else will touch you. You’re mine.” She got up slowly, her legs barely carrying her weight. Blood stained her gown. Pain bloomed between her thighs. Her soul felt hollow. She walked back to the servant quarters like a ghost. She scrubbed her body until it burned. She prayed until her knees gave out. But no matter how hard she cried, she couldn’t wash away what he took. The next morning, she was called to work like nothing happened. And so she worked. She scrubbed floors. She served food. She changed bedsheets. And each time she saw him, he smiled at her like they shared a secret. He would brush her waist when he passed, whisper her name like it was a pet, drop wads of cash in her locker. She never touched the money. She never spoke to him. But her silence didn’t stop him. Weeks passed. The others began to notice something had changed. Her smile disappeared. Her appetite vanished. And one morning, she collapsed while cleaning the hallway. A test was done. The result came back positive. She was pregnant. Malik didn’t flinch. “It’s mine,” he said. “Don’t worry, I’ll take care of everything.” But Aishah didn’t want care. She wanted her old life back. She wanted her innocence, her safety, her faith. The head maid accused her of seducing the master. Some of the maids whispered that she planned it all to trap a rich man. But she said nothing. Not a word. Even when her aunt came crying, shouting, slapping her, she remained silent. Her mother was told, and the shame crushed the woman like illness never could. “You’ve disgraced me,” she said over the phone, coughing and sobbing. “You were supposed to help us—not end up with a bastard in your belly.” Aishah cried for days. She tried to abort. She starved herself. Drank strange herbs. But the baby stayed. And so she carried it. Through pain. Through shame. Through Malik’s constant presence. He decorated a room for her. Bought clothes. Paid nurses. Called it love. But love didn’t feel like this. Love didn’t taste like violation. When labour came, it came fast and wild. She screamed for hours in the private hospital he arranged. And when the child came—a girl—she stared at her daughter’s face and saw both beauty and trauma. The child looked like him. But her tiny fingers wrapped around Aishah’s hand like a lifeline. She named her Amatullah. Servant of Allah. Because only Allah had stayed with her. Malik came with gifts. He held the baby and called her perfect. He looked at Aishah with soft eyes and said, “I want to marry you. I’ll make you my second wife.” She stared at him, her face blank. “So that you can make it halal after already ruining me?” she whispered. “So that I will thank you for giving me what I never asked for?” He frowned. “Don’t be ungrateful. You could have been nothing. Look at your life now.” Her voice broke as she replied, “I was more than nothing before you touched me. I had dignity. I had peace.” She refused his offer. Took her baby. Left the mansion. He let her go, maybe out of guilt, maybe out of boredom. He transferred money into her account. Gave her a house in a quiet town. But she never answered his calls again. She built a small life with her daughter, opening a tailoring shop, staying close to the mosque, crying quietly at night. The child grew, smart and curious, always asking, “Mummy, who is my father?” And Aishah would answer, “Someone I never want you to become.” But the world is small. News spreads fast. One day, the TV screamed headlines: “Billionaire Malik Okoye Dies in Road Crash.” Aisha froze. Her daughter stood beside her. “That’s him, isn’t it?” she asked. Aishah nodded slowly. “Yes. That’s him.” And when the reporters came asking for statements, she gave none. She went to the mosque, prayed for his soul, and whispered, “Only Allah knows what you were.” Then she walked home, held her daughter close, and for the first time in years, slept without tears.

It’s time to pause, relax and be taken care of today. We have just one work for you; prepare a special meal using Golden Penny Oil.

Wishing you a relaxing Worker’s Day celebration and a fresh start to the new month

#GoldenPennyOil #EatWellLiveWell #WorkersDay

BITTER LEAF SOUP(OFE ONUGBU)

DESCRIPTION:
This bitter leaf soup recipe (also know as Ofe Onugbu) is generously stocked with flavoursome meats, fish and cocoyams. Make it when you’re in the mood for something warm, serve with your favourite swallow, Relax "and enjoy.
It is very delicious

INGREDIENTS:
½ cup washed bitter leaf
4 to 10 medium cocoyams
10 medium size assorted meats
3 medium smoked or dry fish
5 cups of palm fruit(optional)
1 medium size stock fish
Ground dry pepper, to taste
1 tbsp. ogiri (locust beans)
½ cup ground crayfish
2 cooking spoons palm oil
Seasoning/salt to taste

METHOD:
1.wash and boil the cocoyam till tender,"

2 Pill then blend or pound in a mortar.

3.Soak the stock fish in hot water to soften for 5mins

4. Season and boil the assorted meat until
tender

5.Cook and extract your palm fruit then pour into the pot

6.Then add the stock fish and dry fish and allow boiling for 10 minutes.

7.Add the cocoyam paste and stir very well. (you can add more water if it’s too thick), allow cooking for 5 minutes.

8.Add the palm oil, ogiri, dry pepper, ground crayfish and cook for 3 minutes.

9.Add the bitter leaf, seasoning and salt to taste. Allow simmering for 5 minutes.