It took me so long to learn how to unlove people who hurt me instead of giving me the love I deserve.
It took me so many sleepless nights to teach myself that some people don’t deserve me.
It took me many years to forgive myself for all the self-hatred, for doubting myself when I wanted to take a step further, for trying to fix others when my heart was shaky and my voice was gone.
I was so busy trying to understand others while ignoring how deep the pain was in my heart that I started becoming numb to how others treated me.
So, when you try to love me, I don’t want you to love me on days that I am happy and my eyes are brimming with hope, I don’t want to be loved when I am singing with love, when my voice is filled with life.
I want you to accept my saddest smiles, my emptiness, my cold stares and my sad songs. I need you to know that it took me so much to accept myself, it took me a lot to understand who I am, it took me days to own my dreams and stand for myself.
So, when you try to shake my beliefs, know that I am unshakable, know that I am not ready to be half loved, know that I am worthy of love even when you can’t give me the world.